You're missing something obvious. [Gary] on Library

Evelyn Stones

June 02, 2020 7:05 PM

You're missing something obvious. [Gary] by Evelyn Stones

Evelyn didn't want to be the sort of person who meddled. She didn't want to make anything harder for Ness than it already was. Which was why it had served her well to wait. Patience was getting easier these days, which was a bit bittersweet. Probably good practice for her impending maternal doom. Which was probably not fair to CJ, but whatever. She was allowed to be grumpy about it for the next two and a half years.

When Gary had explained the new system, wherein anyone could take a shot at being DM, and wherein he was being an absolute dolt, Evelyn had found her in. She wasn't about to ask Gary why he was being dumb and not being interested in dating Ness - he had the right not to want to date his fellow Aladren, even if he didn't go about expressing that very well - but she could tackle other issues. Hopefully this wouldn't blow up in her face.

As she had thought she might, Evelyn found Gary sitting in a secluded corner of the library. From the look of concentration on his face, he was as likely to be working on studying as DMing, and she thought he probably wouldn't mind the interruption either way. She'd brought her own bag of studying to do and didn't at all mind not getting to do it. Of course, she probably shouldn't underestimate Gary either; he was an Aladren after all.

"Hey," she said lightly as she took one of the seats on the side of the table from where he was sitting; these seats were her favorite because it meant they could see each other but didn't have to stare, and they could hear each other but didn't have to either whisper or shout. "Mind if I join you?" She didn't want to smile too much and make it seem fake, but she also didn't want to be a jerk and she did like Gary on the whole, so her tone was somewhere between polite and pleasant, and she raised her eyebrows to make it a sincere question. If he wanted her to go, she would. "I wanted to ask you something about DnD," she added, in case context would make a difference.

22 Evelyn Stones You're missing something obvious. [Gary] 1422 Evelyn Stones 1 5

Gary Harper

June 02, 2020 7:34 PM

I am? Did I fail a perception check? by Gary Harper

Arithmancy was weird. He had poked around at some of the higher orders of math over the summer for fun and because he'd need to know the stuff in his future endeavors. This was just odd though. Magic could make numbers do some really strange things. Some of this felt like playing through Final Fantasy Tactics with a party of Calculators. If you could get all the numbers figured out and lined up there was some amazing things that could happen, but getting to that point was a nightmare.

Fortunately for him, he was interrupted. Goodness he needed a break. Turns out it was Evelyn siting down at his table. Well, not 'his' table, the library table that he was sitting at. "No, not at all, be my guest." He wasn't sure what brought Evelyn around, maybe she had some classwork question. Some nice, simple fifth year level stuff would be nice right about now.

Her next statement answered his question quickly enough. He smiled hopefully, this was potentially even better than fifth year level homework. Although, it also could be something terrible. Maybe she wanted to run a game session which would be fantastic! On the other hand, maybe she was here to say that Ness hates him and the two of them are leaving the group and taking Heinrich with them because they can and he'd go with them. That would be less than ideal.

So, he put on the best smile he could, probably tinged with more than a little uncertainty, and inquired further. "Sure, what's up?"

2 Gary Harper I am? Did I fail a perception check? 1404 0 5

Evelyn Stones

June 02, 2020 7:46 PM

Badly. And the save. by Evelyn Stones

"Thanks," Evelyn said, smiling a little then. He was working on arithmancy, and Evelyn resisted the urge to redirect to talk about that instead. She was pretty sure she was definitely going to have to take arithmancy, and pretty sure she wouldn't be terrible at it. It was a source of near ceaseless frustration for her that she had to wait until next year to begin. Two years in the hardest subjects at Sonora didn't seem like nearly enough. Still, it did mean she didn't need to worry about it just yet. Maybe she'd begin looking at it over the summer.

Gary was excited to talk about DnD, which was bittersweet. She thought that he probably should be, but then also that he should make it so that these conversations didn't have to happen. "It's about the DM thing," she said slowly. "I wondered . . . well, do you not want Ness to do it?"

As it turned out, she really had only gotten so far in this whole thing where she was supposed to it it through first. She knew what she wanted to say, she just hadn't planned on how to say it. "Ness would be good at it and would really enjoy it. I wasn't sure if you were opening it up to other people because you didn't think so?" She frowned a little, showing what she thought of this idea. "Is there something going on?"

22 Evelyn Stones Badly. And the save. 1422 0 5

Gary Harper

June 04, 2020 5:41 PM

Bugger. Now what do I do? by Gary Harper

Dangit. He had royally screwed up at the feast hadn't he? It had just been one long string of critical failures... and now here Evelyn was to let him know that they were going to go find better uses for their time this year. Gary sighed. Was there any hope? Was Evelyn here to give him one more chance to explain himself before the only people at this school that he could even remotely count as something close to friends would abandon him? He probably deserved it. It would just be nice to know why, maybe Evelyn could enlighten him.

Well, if he was going to find out anything, or convince them to stay, he was going to have to do this right. He sat up and turned to face Evelyn, "To start off, let me tell you that Ness is without a doubt the most experienced and qualified person I know of at the school to take over next year. I would love to have Ness take over and run the club once I'm gone." He paused a moment to collect his next line of thoughts.

"I know, I could have just asked Ness, and Ness would have jumped at the chance without hesitation." He sighed, "But that wouldn't have been fair. Planning, designing and running these games takes a fair amount of work and time. I don't know that Ness knows the full ramifications of committing to taking over." He slouched back in his chair a bit, "Plus, running the game is an entirely different experience than playing. Some people really like it, some people don't. It's hard to say what you'll think of it until you actually do it."

He hoped this was making some level of sense. Regardless, he forged ahead, "I would hate myself if I got Ness, or anyone for that matter, into a position that they either didn't have time for, or just didn't like, but they felt they had to stay in it because everyone else was relying on them to keep the games going." He dropped his gaze to the books at the table in front of him. "That was some of the problem I ran into my fifth year. I felt like I had to keep generating game content to keep things going that I pretty much forgot that I had CATS at the end of the year. I can't afford to do that this year, and I can't ask anyone else to do that either."

"That's why I wanted to give everyone a shot this year." Gary looked back at Evelyn, "I wanted Ness, and anyone else that wanted to, a chance to see what it is like to pull a game together and sit behind the GM screen. I wanted them to have the full experience, to know what they are getting into before they sign up for anything." He shrugged despondently, "Anything else just seemed wrong."

He should just leave it at that, but he couldn't, "How mad is Ness? I really didn't want to hurt Ness, but that conversation just went from bad to worse." Another sigh escaped him, "I really probably shouldn't have used Morgan as an example."

2 Gary Harper Bugger. Now what do I do? 1404 0 5

Evelyn Stones

June 04, 2020 7:21 PM

Put the down your character sheet and try being Gary. by Evelyn Stones

Evelyn nodded emphatically. For his part, Gary was kind. He wasn't trying to screw up horribly. "I agree," she began. She leaned back in her chair, letting just a moment's exhaustion show on her face. She sure as heck wouldn't have wanted to DM had Gary asked and she was glad that wasn't an issue anyway. "Ness is without a doubt the most experienced and qualified person." She fixed him with a stern, albeit sympathetic look. After all, he had been trying. "Ness is also one of the most careful, cleverest, most thoughtful people I think either of us knows. A rational, objective person, who would have been perfectly capable of recognising that without you making that decision." She cocked her head. "It isn't that you wanted other folks to have a try. I think Ness would be on board with that. It's that you went to Ness to announce a decision that you'd made without giving Ness the chance to have any say because you thought you could make the decision better than Ness could. Good move, white guy." She let a little humor deep into her voice, although she was perfectly serious too. If you had to pick anyone to accidentally perpetuate the patriarchy against, she wouldn't recommend a McLeod. "Ness probably would be a really good person to help with some of all this," she added leaning forward and talking a little more softly. Whatever else was the case, Gary was admitting to being overwhelmed, to acting out of obligation, to feeling alone. Evelyn really wished that she could tell him about the fact that they knew of someone mutually who probably would have been perfectly happy to help him be less alone, but that was too far into Ness' business. "Also yes, you shouldn't have picked Morgan," she smirked.

Evelyn looked at Gary and tried to really see him. Not just as Ness' friend or whatever, not just as a prefect, not just as Heinrich's friend, not just as a DM, but as Gary. It turned out that that was impossible, because he was all those things and more. She resisted the urge to reach out and hold his hand, aware that such gestures of affection could be confusing even for those who weren't so actively dating minded.

"Gary, do you know that we love you?" she asked, confident that she could speak for the rest of the DnD group on that front. "We don't just love you because you're the best DM the world has ever known, but because you're Gary. You're smart and you're funny and you're kind when you're not accidentally insulting people. You're a really really good friend, and if you never wanted to DM another day in your life, we would still be your friends. Also, we absolutely still have to get together for drag shows and stuff at Ness' and Kir's. That wasn't an empty invitation. We all care about you. Ness'," she added, "cares about you."

22 Evelyn Stones Put the down your character sheet and try being Gary. 1422 0 5

Gary Harper

June 04, 2020 9:18 PM

I... I don't know how to do that... by Gary Harper

Gary wanted to argue, he wanted to explain. The reason for this was so that he wasn't making decisions for anybody. He was helping them to get the information they needed to make their own informed decision. Wasn't he? That was good right? He wilted as Evelyn talked, and grimaced at the 'white guy' comment. Talk about an insult, that was about the worst thing you could be called around the McLeods. Yet it fit. He was the perfect 'white guy'. Yay, he may as well just pack up and leave town now.

He almost snorted in disbelief when Evelyn leaned in and suggested that Ness would be a good person to help with this all. He gave the girl an incredulous look, "Ness doesn't like me at this point. I should have roped Ness into more things last year when it was at least an indifferent attitude." Then grumbling under his breath, "If I had Ness run the 'Genderless Space Pirate Robot' game in the first place, we wouldn't have this problem." He shook his head slowly, then thumped it against the Arithamancy book in front of him on the table. Why were people so difficult, why weren't they easy to understand like Arithmancy?

What did they want from him? What did they want him to be? Jasmine just had wanted him to be a prince. Heinrich wanted him to be some dark evil to smite in game. Ness wanted a DM? someone to argue/discuss magical theory with? ...his position? Evelyn wanted him to be....?

'Gary, do you know that we love you?'

He stopped thumping his head against his book. What? He looked at her dully as she talked. Something tugged at his gut and he quickly turned away and clenched his eyes shut. Evelyn wanted him to be himself? Who was that even? Well... apparently Evelyn wanted him to be himself, in a dress. The mental image was too much; him, Evelyn, Ness, Kir, Heinrich, Zev all posing for a picture in the most wrong outfits ever. Together. It was definitely a laugh that burst out from his mouth, not some sort of emotion soaked sob of belonging that his gut was furiously trying to wring out of him.

Evelyn said they cared about him. Whether or not it was true didn't really matter at the moment. It was nice to hear. He had needed to hear it. He took a few deep breaths to try and settle whatever his stomach had been doing. He tried to give Evelyn the same incredulous look he had used earlier, "Ness cares about me?" He wanted to ask why and at the same time he didn't. "Well, if you would be so kind as to convey my most sincere and abject apologies, I would be most appreciative. Also, whatever reparations are required from this 'white guy', I will do my best to accommodate." He paused, "Including whatever attire is deemed necessary for your show."

2 Gary Harper I... I don't know how to do that... 1404 0 5

Evelyn Stones

June 04, 2020 9:51 PM

You're not doing so bad right now. by Evelyn Stones

"Ness doesn't know you're sorry at this point," Evelyn pointed out. "And yes, you're probably right. But probably apologising, and giving Ness the information necessary to make a decision is better than having all the information and sort of . . . not letting others make that, yknow?" She was going to suggest that Gary wouldn't like it much if someone came in with all the knowledge about what his perfect career would be and just told him to go do it without telling him why, or told him not to do a career they knew would be bad for him without telling him why, but she thought that Gary actually might really appreciate that. The thought almost made her laugh. Mr. Row would certainly have an easier job if he knew which people to just tell what to do and which ones to give them resources to do it on their own. Or perhaps that was the point . . .

Gary's reaction to her reassurances was proof positive that he needed to hear it, and Evelyn made a decision right then and there to make it her goal to make sure every single person in DnD knew to shower Gary with love for the rest of the year. It was good to see him laugh, and Evelyn grinned. "Ness cares about you," she confirmed softly. "Probably pass those on yourself," Evelyn pointed out, smiling a little wryly. "But I do think you'd look good in powder blue, for what that's worth." She had the sudden mental image of Gary showing up to apologise to Ness with a big bouquet of freshly sharpened pencils ala You've Got Mail, wearing a puffy powder blue dress. It was a great mental image.

"And hey, I'm really sorry I've never told you how important you are before." It made Evelyn really really sad to think about that. She hadn't known she mattered for a long time, but that had changed when she got to Sonora. It sounded like maybe Gary hadn't had anyone change that on purpose. Perhaps he'd been better at hiding it than Evelyn had. Perhaps he'd only recently realised that mattering for what he was didn't feel as important as mattering for who he was. "I know a bit about what that feels like. I don't matter much at home. If it weren't for Ness, and Heinrich, and you, and people making sure that I knew I mattered, I probably wouldn't. If you wanna talk about that or hug it out or whatever, that can be arranged."

22 Evelyn Stones You're not doing so bad right now. 1422 0 5

Gary Harper

June 05, 2020 1:00 PM

I'm not really convinced on that by Gary Harper

"You don't think it would be best if you talked to Ness a bit first?" He asked hopefully, "To try and get Ness to the point of actually listening to anything I have to say again? It would be..." easier, he finished in his head. That was some of the point, wasn't it? To try and do a quick and easy fix on the problem wasn't going to work here. He was going to have to actually fix what he broke. Somehow. "No, that wouldn't work, would it?" he voiced dejectedly. "I don't suppose you have any good ideas on how to start the conversation, do you?"

He waved his hand at Evelyn's apology, dismissing the fault. "Thanks, but it's not a big deal, don't worry about it. It's nice to hear from time to time, but I'm fine. The last thing I want is to burden anyone with unnecessary guilt or... anything else for that matter. Don't make to big of a deal out of it. I..." he struggled with the words he wanted for a moment or two, "I don't want people to think they need to go out of their way to keep me happy. I'll be fine." He sighed and smirked faintly, "Hugs are nice, but I don't need more problems. Fate would decide that would be the moment for Heinrich to wander over and then I'd be in some real trouble." He tried to end with a playful grin, but he wasn't sure it was working quite right.

As they had a tendency to do, his mind and mouth began to wander on their own accord. "Jasmine would give me occasional hugs. Those were nice. Sadly we both decided this summer that such a relationship wouldn't work out in the long run." Hey... he was talking to a girl. A girl that may have some useful insights on girl-type things.

"I've got a question for you, if you don't mind..." He began slowly, "I asked Ness and Heinrich so far and neither have had any sort of useful answer. Maybe you'll have a better one." A thought occurred to him,"Maybe Heinrich has already brought you up to speed." The despondent look left his face at the change in subject, "In any case, as stated previously, Jasmine and I aren't going to work out in the long run. However, she was still open to dating through the school year and parting ways afterwards. I need to give her some sort of answer soon, but I'm not sure what I want to do. Do we keep dating and I gain a little more experience interacting with girls while risking stopping any other potentially longer-term relationship from forming? Or do I spend the year looking for a girl that is also interested in attempting to form a long-term relationship risking gaining absolutely nothing in that area by the end of the year?"

He stopped to take a breath. "Ness seemed a bit upset already so just told me she never saw the appeal of Jasmine and didn't know of any girls that might be available. Heinrich tried to turn the whole thing back on me. That didn't really help. Do you have any thoughts or know of any possibly interested girls?" He really didn't have any hopes on that last part, but it never hurt to ask, right?

2 Gary Harper I'm not really convinced on that 1404 0 5

Evelyn Stones

June 05, 2020 1:41 PM

I promise. by Evelyn Stones

Evelyn watched Gary work through the problem, smiling at the look on his face as he came to the conclusion that he was ultimately going to have to do this himself. "I think probably just being honest," she said. As much as she really was glad that Gary was maybe going to do this, she couldn't help feeling a little bad, too. Ness was terrifying at the best of times, and it was one of the many things Evelyn loved about her friend, but she also hadn't had to be on the receiving end of it. Ness could be sassy and sarcastic and hurtful without meaning to and Evelyn was pretty sure it was a defense mechanism. That might not be helpful to point out, and Gary knew that as well as Evelyn did. "It's good of you to want to apologise. I think that will mean a lot."

It was a bit frustrating watching someone talk themselves out of being cared for and Evelyn resisted the urge to thunk solidly into him until he knew he was important. She did raise an eyebrow dangerously at his comment about Heinrich. It also sort of made her feel nice to think of Heinrich being jealous, but she was pretty sure he wouldn't really be jealous of her hugging Gary. Right? Was that a thing she should be thinking about? Would she be jealous if Evelyn walked over in time to see Heinrich hugging Jessica Hayles or something? She probably would be, but it was because that would be one more hug that Jessica had gotten than Evelyn had. Of course, that could be said either way. . . . she was really going to have to talk to Heinrich about this sometime soon.

"He's reasonable," Evelyn replied. "I think he may even join in if I said that you needed some affection in your life." She wrinkled her nose, thinking of it. "Or maybe he wouldn't," she laughed. "But I think he'd be fine. Generally, people don't get to tell me who I'm allowed to hug unless they're the person being hugged."

The topic turned to dating, which Evelyn thought was a very dangerous topic, but she was also a bit surprised that Gary was willing to ask. It said something about his pride that he didn't mind. But also, Evelyn had just had a similar sort of conversation with Malikhi and she hadn't been much help than either. She shook her head about Heinrich. "He keeps people's private business private, on the whole."

She frowned at Jasmine's suggestion. That was super crappy of her. "I think you should definitely not date Jasmine," she said. "You don't need experience with someone who just wants to have fun with you when that's not what it sounds like you want. Plus, you interact with girls just fine," she smiled. "Most of them won't bite you, I promise. And you won't have gained nothing if you don't end up with a long term relationship, because you'll at least have had more experience in that area. It sounds like the risk is about equal between the two options, but one has way less chance to gain something meaningful." She frowned again. "You deserve better than someone who wants to put you on the back burner. It's fine if she doesn't want to date you - people should only date people they want to date - but she shouldn't drag you through the mud behind her flying horse, either."

As far as possibly interested girls, Evelyn wasn't sure how to help. For one, she had no idea who to send Gary to since she only saw him interact with the DnD group and that left Evelyn herself - no - Morgan - no - or Ness - not "a girl" and maybe not interested? So she wasn't sure what to do on that front. Platitudes wouldn't help him at all, as much as she wanted to promise that nice things would happen for him or he'd find the right person. It was true, but that didn't help. The first girl to come to mind in Gary's own year was Tatiana, who would admittedly be a rather cute fit for the dungeon master, but Evelyn doubted it would go over well for either of them. Tatiana didn't seem ready to throw off the pearly shackles of her life in favor of table-top gaming. That all being said, Gary used 'she' for Ness, and Evelyn thought it was really borderline dumb of him not to realise the problem there if he was looking for a girl, whether or not Ness would use 'she' aside.

"I think you'll probably have a much better time this year if you don't date someone you don't see it going anywhere with, unless you just want something casual," she summarised her previous thoughts before moving forward. She was not about to tell Gary what Ness thought of him, but if the idea were in his head, then they could all go figure that out for themselves. She absolutely thought Lyssa was perfect for Ness and didn't want to get in the way of that, but it wouldn't do anyone any good if Ness and Gary really did like each other and it didn't happen because neither of them said anything. Stinkin' Aladrens, man. "I don't even know who goes to school here," she laughed, putting up a hand to count on her fingers. "Tatiana, Ruby and Peyton, Sylvia and Caitlin... wow, why are there so many snotty girls here? Then there's my year." She put her hand down. "I don't recommend a Brockert," she said, wrinkling her nose. Allegra was nice enough, but the girl would probably faint if a boy approached her without 'pureblood breadwinner' stamped on his forehead. "Lyssa, Me, Katerina," she began, watching Gary's face. If he went and dated Lyssa now, Evelyn would have to really murder him. "I'm taken," she smiled, "Katerina is probably more particular than her sister, and I don't think you and Lyssa know each other well? I don't know how particular you are about it needing to be a girl . . . but . . . Ness is in my year too."

It was really hard being friends with people because if she was friends with both of them, who was she supposed to help? Was she being helpful at all anyway? "I like Heinrich because he's been a good friend, he's been kind, and he's smart. He's also super cute, but don't go spreading that around," she smiled. She found it very amusing to be silly and playful about liking Heinrich, because it didn't seem silly or playful at all. She really liked him a lot. Like a lot. She didn't want to think about other words people used for that. But she was pretty sure he felt the same way, and if co-parenting really was in their future, then this was not just because he was cute. But it did help. "I think that if you want to find someone to be with long term, you have to find someone who makes you happy, and who's a good friend first. Someone you can hang out with. Whether that's at Sonora or afterwards. The nice thing is that if you spend the year finding that person, even if you don't end up dating, you get a great friend out of the deal."

22 Evelyn Stones I promise. 1422 0 5

Gary Harper

June 06, 2020 10:52 AM

I wish I could be as confident as you by Gary Harper

Gary grimaced slightly and nodded at Evelyn's suggestions. "Yeah, that's mostly a given at this point. However that is only applicable once I've convinced Ness to listen... and gotten past the slew of hexes flying my direction." He ruminated a moment on the possibilities of Ness' arsenal by this point, "Maybe I should swing by Parker's dueling club before I make the attempt." He added half-jokingly. The other half was wondering if that may actually be a good idea.

Maybe he should just swing it to have a special session with Professor Brooding-Hawthorne. He could just imagine that, 'Hi Professor. I said dumb things to Ness McLeod and need to apologize. What do you have up your sleeve to help me survive the encounter?' His imagined response wasn't very helpful. 'Sorry kid, I'd recommend seeing the Deputy-Headmistress about drawing up some transfer papers over to Hogwarts to finish out your last year of schooling.'

He wasn't about to suggest to Evelyn that he knew Heinrich better than she did, he really most likely didn't. But Heinrich did not really strike him as the 'hugging type'. He did nod at her statement about hugging access. "As it should be. But..." He hesitated for just a moment, "that won't stop others from thinking what they want." Shrugging again he continued, "And in a perfect world, that shouldn't matter one bit."

Evelyn's near immediate displeasure at Jasmine took him a bit off guard. He felt the need to jump to her defense, "It's not quite like that," he said shaking his head. "Jasmine isn't doing anything bad." Again he struggled a bit to figure out the words he wanted to use. "It was a mutual understanding that we came to, she just left the option open if it was one I wanted to take." He looked at Evelyn with a tinge of worry, "Isn't that what this is all about? Sharing information and options so that everyone was able to make their own informed decisions?"

He was a little uncertain about her statement and bobbled his head back and forth in a sign of non-commitment to the idea. "Probably, but at least there would be some certainty behind it. If I really messed it up, the end would just come a bit sooner than the end of the year. If I messed it up with someone with Potential... I could lose a lot more." Another grimace crossed his face, "That worry will always be there without the end definitely being in sight."

Evelyn began to count off girls and he was momentarily taken aback by her commentary. 'Snotty girls'? That wasn't very nice. It did remind him of the fact that she was in fact a Pecari and not a Teppenpaw. For some reason his brain had slid her into a new house at some point during this conversation... maybe earlier. It didn't sound like she approved of any of those girls. Which was a little sad, but he couldn't argue. He hadn't interacted with any of them enough to really form his own opinion, plus Peyton was Jasmine's best friend and that could just get a little weird.

Then she began on her year. Lyssa? That was Parker's sister, right? He'd had some minor interactions with her and she seemed alright, but like everyone else, he'd be starting at pretty much square one. Evelyn was right in that he didn't know her well, but that was true for nearly everyone. Nodding along in open non-comittal he briefly wondered if he should ask Parker what he thought, but then figured that was one of those 'white guy' thoughts about controlling the decisions of women through their men 'patriarchal' things that everyone hated. Still, Parker probably knew her best and him, and would have the best idea if anything along Evelyn's suggested line of thinking would actually work out.

When Evelyn put herself on the list, he raised an eyebrow. She fairly quickly added that she was taken though. A-ha! He knew it. She and Heinrich did like each other, he now had confirmation. Well, he assumed as much based on the hugging test experiment he had run earlier. If she wasn't taken by Heinrich, he wasn't sure what was going on.

If Tatiana wasn't a valid option, Katerina sounded less so. Again he'd have to trust Evelyn on that one.

Then Gary's brain shorted out.

Ness... no... that's... Some sort of audio input was being registered by his ears. But his mind was having trouble processing anything at the moment. The word 'Heinrich' slipped through then 'cute'. His eyes were trying to tell him that Evelyn's mouth was moving but such information was routed down some low priority neural pathway. Ness? But... Ness was.. what? Query Ness.gender returns 'unspecified[not-girl]'. Query Ness.known beliefs (males) returns 'Males = Not to be trusted' result may be subject to individual child class overrides for associations, inferred from Ness.known beliefs (Patriarchy). Query Ness.known beliefs (Patriarchy) returns 'Patriarchy = Evil AND requires eradication'. Query Ness.associations (GaryHarper) returns Inherits from Males 'Member of Patriarchy'; updated Event.Sonora.7OpenFeast; Previously 'DM AND friend'.

Evelyn.statement input(inference) results Ness.gender = 'unspecified' AND Ness.associations(GaryHarper) = 'Possible romantic interest'. Conflicted state detected. Interaction log review required for conflict resolution. Re-initializing states to default for analysis. Please wait...

Gary sat, staring blankly over Evelyn's shoulder off into nothingness. Memories flooded through his brain. Interactions with Ness now being analyzed from an outside perspective. A few moments later he simply blinked and said in something near a whisper, "Oh, sweet Sune... what have I done...?"

2 Gary Harper I wish I could be as confident as you 1404 0 5

Evelyn Stones

June 06, 2020 4:31 PM

It hasn't worked great in my favor, but it's not all bad. by Evelyn Stones

Evelyn raised an eyebrow, wondering whether Gary knew what dangerous territory he was on. "Probably don't start out by suggesting that you don't think listening is part of Ness' character sheet," she offered. Hexing was more likely but still not terribly. "Do it in the library. Books are too precious to send hexes flying nearby," she added a bit more teasingly.

She smiled a little more sadly when Gary talked about people thinking what they would and how it shouldn't matter but did. Truth be told, Evelyn rarely thought about such things. There were too many other things for her to think about to spend time worrying about what people were thinking of her. Of course, this is also part of why, again, Heinrich had maybe thought that she was dating Ness, and why Ness thought that it was the most obvious thing in the world that she and Heinrich would date or were already dating. Joke's on them; Evelyn was just enjoying herself. Really, it hadn't even backfired that badly. But she knew that that didn't mean Gary didn't have big things on his mind, just different big things, and if Evelyn hadn't been sure before that social validation was one of them, she was now.

Sitting back a little, she couldn't help admitting Gary had a good point about informed decisions. Little as she liked what Jasmine had suggested, she knew that it wasn't strictly wrong. Perhaps she was just less protective of Jasmine than she was of Gary. Or perhaps, she trusted Jasmine to be able to make that design less biasedly than Gary could. Which really was the heart of the problem on both sides. "I'm sorry," she frowned. "You're right. And mutual agreement is good. I just . . . you seemed so happy to be going to the Ball with her, and I don't want her to take advantage of that for the sake of a little fun this year. It doesn't seem like the prospect of dating her makes you even a little bit happy, it's just an internship in girls."

His outlook on girls was sort of tragic, really. Evelyn was happy to be dating but she didn't think that her value depended more or less on how successful her relationship with Heinrich went. It was a matter of happiness for her, not self-worth. Perhaps she was reading too much into it with Gary, and obviously she really wanted things to work out with Heinrich, but if he'd only wanted to be friends, she would've just been sad. Not worthless. Not having messed up. "I think that if it's someone with whom there's real potential, then messing up won't be so bad either. They'll get it, you'll get it, and you'll be able to talk it out. Because that makes it completely easy now, right?" she added sarcastically, smiling again. "I'm sorry. I know that saying it is not the same as just doing it. There's a lot more on the line in action than in words."

Gary looked like she'd just confirmed something for him when she said she was taken, and Evelyn realised in retrospect that Heinrich might not have told Gary yet. Were they not supposed to be telling people? She was pretty sure it wasn't a secret, especially if it was as 'obvious' to everyone else as it was to Ness. But now she sort of felt bad. Also, if Gary hadn't known they were dating, then what the heck was Heinrich supposed to care if Evelyn went around hugging other guys? That seemed . . . odd. Perhaps he'd been testing the waters? Or perhaps he'd been trying not to get in the way of a potential romantic interest?

She didn't mean to be talking so much, but she felt a little less bad about it when Gary was . . . maybe not listening at all anyway? Well that wasn't very nice of him. He'd asked for her advice and now he wasn't even listening to her? She glanced over her shoulder where it looked like Gary was looking, wondering if she'd missed the arrival of a kobald in the library. Finding none, she looked back at her friend with her head cocked and her eyebrows furrowed. Her hair - it really was getting very long - fell past her shoulder and she swiped it out of the way to put her elbow on the table.

She opened her mouth to ask if he was okay when he whispered something that sounded a lot like what she thought a brain aneurysm and a heart attack having a fear-baby might sound like. Had she broken Gary? "What?" she asked, glancing behind her one more time. Had she missed something? "What's wrong?" Had she said something wrong? She'd been talking about Heinrich being great, which seemed like it could be a little weird for him but he wasn't appalled, he was horrified. Was that because of Ness? That was rude. "What's wrong?" she said again, a little bit more concerned.

22 Evelyn Stones It hasn't worked great in my favor, but it's not all bad. 1422 0 5

Gary Harper

June 06, 2020 7:40 PM

Learn from the bad and revel in the good. by Gary Harper

The library took shape around Gary once more. What had just happened? Was that what it felt like to level up? The numbers on the experience box tick up to the right amount and suddenly you're stronger or smarter or know things you didn't before. Honestly, he felt a little sick. What had he done? Had Ness actually... liked him? All of the hanging out, all of the conversations, the gaming, the opinions about Jasmine. But Ness didn't... No. That was a potentially flawed assumption, not something he actually knew. Not something he ever even bothered to find out.

Evelyn was staring at him. She looked concerned. "I am a terrible person." was the reply that found its way out of his mouth to her question. He blinked, shook his head and repeated the statement in a firm, but sadly resigned tone while looking back down at his book, "I am a terrible person." His expression sagged. "Did Ness ever tell you how we first 'officially' met?

It was the fair at Tumbleweed when you were both first years. We got to talking analyzing the funhouse mirror that swaps your gender." A mirthless smile crossed his lips at the memory, "I'm sure you can imagine how that went. It was fun, but based on how that stupid mirror responded, I assigned a 'not-girl' status to Ness. At the time it was no big deal, and it was reinforced over time. Plenty. So when it came time for me to start thinking about girls... I put Ness into the same category as Heinrich or Parker without even noticing." He sighed, "Jasmine caught my..." there was a brief pause before continuing with the word "eye, and things just progressed."

Now he pulled his gaze back up to Evelyn. "You tell me now that everyone cares about me and Ness cares about me." He carefully emphasized the separation of everyone vs. Ness. "Also that Ness is a potential candidate for my inquiry. While also admitting Ness doesn't exactly fit into the 'girl' category."

His eyes drifted once more over Evelyn's shoulder. "I was just forced to review so many of my interactions with Ness and" he sighed, "You might be on to something. All this time I've been utterly oblivious and dismissive of it. We've never talked along those lines..." he grimaced again, "Other than me talking about Jasmine. I just tossed Ness into that box and walked away from it without a question or comment. I am a terrible person."

Gary's gaze wandered back to the book, the shelves around Evelyn, anywhere but actually looking at her. He couldn't. "Ness deserves someone worlds better than me, not that there would be any chance of that happening anymore. His fist thumped into the table next to the book and his eyes finally found Evelyn's again. "I can't even say that though, can I? It's not my decision to make? That's just as bad as anything else I've ever done. I've still got to talk to Ness, to make sure Ness can make the decision to officially spurn the horrible 'white guy'."

A look of hopelessness took root, "What happens if Ness accepts the apology and for some strange reason wants to 'date' a terrible person?" He shook his head, "I want a family. I want a wife to love and children to raise and become the next generation of adventurous souls out to rid the realms of evil. Can you honestly see Ness in that role?" He didn't let much room for a response, "I know, that's Ness' decision to make as well. Not mine."

A smile washed across his somber face, "I've imagined some fantastic scenes in my day, and I can picture it, but it is a strange one. Me and Ness sitting at a big gaming table with Kir and Zev, and you and Heinrich all trying to play a game while we keep shouting at the combined passel of rugrat cousins making a ruckus in the other room." he let out a weak chuckle before the image faded from his mind and the smile went with it.

"I'll talk to Ness. Sort out the game club thing, sort out...." he waved his hand in something of a hopeless gesture. "Then I guess finish out the year here and see what luck I've got over at MENTAL." He focused on Evelyn once again, "I'm sorry about everything. Thanks for coming to talk, I'm sorry for ranting and rambling as well. I hate to be a burden, I'd much rather help people carry theirs. I am still open for any sort of advise you have that might help." He almost cracked the traditional Gary grin, "The book surrounded location for the talk is a good one."

2 Gary Harper Learn from the bad and revel in the good. 1404 0 5

Evelyn Stones

June 06, 2020 9:19 PM

I just didn't expect it to be this good. by Evelyn Stones

Evelyn blinked and her mouth popped open almost audibly when Gary's reply was that he was a terrible person. She was not sure what to make of that. She managed to close her mouth when he said it gain, although the expression of surprise was plain as ever when Gary asked if Ness had told her how they'd met. They had talked about it some, but Evelyn hadn't expected Gary to remember. Or at least, not to think of it with such clarity. If she had to guess, she would say that Gary liked Ness, whether the latter was a solid fit for the "girl" category or not. She thought about pointing out some Mulan parallels but decided against it. No small amount of vague terror washed over her as she realised that she might've just had a whole lot more influence than she meant to. If Gary asked Ness out now, and Ness asked Lyssa out, then everyone would be hurt. Or it would be perfect. Or it would be terrible.

"You're not a terrible person," Evelyn finally managed when he said it a third time. "A lot of people's brains put people in one of two categories, and if they're not one then they're the other. That isn't really accurate, but that's something you often have to unlearn on purpose. Learning doesn't make you a terrible person. If you'd responded that Ness was absolutely a girl or absolutely a boy, that would be a problem. Ness is Ness. And that's exactly what you seem to be thinking, too."

She was surprised by the force of his self-flagellation, which only made her think more that he maybe did like Ness. The other option was that he was just bummed out to have missed out on a chance, but that seemed less likely. If nothing else, he was hurting because he had hurt his friend. "I can say this wholeheartedly as the self-proclaimed best friend that if you make Ness happy, then there is no one worlds better," she said softly. "And that you're a genuinely great guy regardless. It's your decision insomuch as you have to decide if that's what you want," she said, swallowing hard. This was going to be so great or so terrible and she really hadn't meant to cause this. "I don't know for sure what Ness wants, but I know you matter a lot, not just to all of us in general."

Evelyn laughed out loud at Gary's 'what-if' being essentially 'what if everything goes great?'. "First, I don't think that would come up from just an apology. If you don't want to date Ness, don't ask. Second, I . . . hmm . . ." She wanted to speak accurately and sensitively. "I don't know if Ness wants to be a wife, or if that would be the right word. But I think that having kids or having a family . . . that would be on the table." Getting into the details of Ness' reproductive abilities was also not a topic she wanted to get into, and she wasn't entirely sure, really. She knew Ness stayed in a girls' dorm, but that didn't mean that traditionally female body parts were associated. In any case, even if they were, Ness may or may not want to use them for such things. "But I can absolutely see Ness being a partner to love, and if children are involved, they will absolutely learn to adventure into the world and rid it of evil. I don't think any McLeod offspring could do any different than that."

A thought occurred to her then and she blinked away tears that she hadn't expected to find lodged within, looking down at her hands for a moment to hide them from someone who clearly needed to talk about himself more often because the dude was not comfortable with it. The thought was that she counted herself among them. That of course she would adventure into the world and rid it of evil, because she was a McLeod. And of course CJ would. And if she had kids someday, then of course they would. Because they were, in part, McLeods. There weren't enough years in a life time to thank Ness for all of that.

When Gary did change the topic to children - cousins! - Evelyn blushed fiercely. 'Little Hexenmeisters' was a recurring theme over the past few weeks and it was one she was trying very hard to be objective about. Or better, not to think about at all. That was a long way off, if it were to happen, and even hoping it did happen, or thinking that maybe Heinrich wanted it to happen felt dangerous. But it really was a nice thought. "That . . . sounds like you know what you want then," Evelyn murmured. "Who you want. I don't know if people usually imagine themselves on a triple date with some other couples, hanging out with a good bud," she smirked. "Rugrat cousins . . ." It came out as a whisper, and the breath of the words tasted good, like stepping into the kitchen when brownies were in the oven and tasting what might yet be to come.

"Believe it or not," Evelyn said, raising an eyebrow at his thanks. "I actually just like talking to you. I could almost definitely use some boy advice sometime," she added, although she didn't think that asking Gary about how best to approach the topic of hand holding or something was probably her best choice. "But for now . . ." She retrieved her transfiguration homework from her bag and laid it out in front of him. "Vanishing Spells?" she asked with a grin.

22 Evelyn Stones I just didn't expect it to be this good. 1422 0 5

Gary Harper

June 07, 2020 9:30 AM

Life, expect the unexpected? by Gary Harper

Gary responded to Evelyn's reassurances with a despondent smile, "That is kind of you to say, and I appreciate it. But, being the one wronged, ultimately it is up to Ness to absolve me of condemnation on that subject." He did nod along, "Ness is most certainly Ness." He honestly wasn't sure how much forgiveness and redemption Ness had for these situations. Most of the time it seemed the subject matter was rightfully and vengefully subject to destruction and elimination. Well, he would find out.

"Make Ness happy?" he replied ruefully, "I don't know if that's something that I can accomplish anymore. I'll be glad to shift Ness up from 'hostile' to 'unfriendly', maybe even to 'neutral' if I can critically succeed at the social interaction." He muttered additionally, "Hopefully I won't have as many negative modifiers working against me this time."

He sighed and agreed, "I do know what I want I guess. For a lot of that, Ness would be great," a faint smile briefly appeared then disappeared, "but, as you said, Ness won't fit into the traditional 'hetronormal' relationship. Ness has been actively crusading against for years." He chuckled a bit, "Another factor contributing to my obliviousness. Ness would not be Ness without that though, and it may be fine for a while..." He trailed off and thought about the discussion he had with Jasmine over the summer. "Things like that can build up. Even if I love Ness for being Ness, Lingering desire for change or resentment for not being someone else, for not being able to give someone what they want... would just lead to bigger problems." He paused a moment, "Whether or not I could be what Ness wanted me to be is the other side of the coin that Ness would have to figure out. I couldn't be what Jasmine wanted."

"Date?" He almost had his old grin back, "Nah, that image was just a family get-together." The grin faded into a sad smile. The image changed in his mind to remove him and have Ness running the game, not much else changed about that scene. He found the image of himself, somewhere else, in a place with an unknown witch. She was just a silhouette with a white question mark. Image Gary seemed happy with her and the little silhouettes running around them, but real Gary felt sad.

"I don't talk about my family much. I was an only child," and he really kind of wished he was again, "Mom died when I was young, but old enough to remember. Dad and I moved afterwards to live nearer my uncle and aunt. They didn't have any kids, so it was just us. I didn't have a big family growing up. I just think it would be nice to have one."

He tried to merge the two separated mental images, to put Image Gary and Mystery Witch at the big table playing in Ness' game. They seemed pleasant enough, but it still didn't quite work, it just wasn't the same. For fun, he swapped seats with Ness and took over the game. Did simulated image Ness just glare at real Gary? Sorry image Ness. Wait, what was that grin for? Image Ness reached over and wrapped Mystery Witch in a hug and kissed her! What the heck Image Ness? Expecting to find some form of shock or something on Image Gary's face he was surprised to see Image Gary smiling happily at the two. What? Image Gary moved over and wrapped them both in a hug and they were all happy? Image Heinrich looked a little uneasy though.

Gary shook his head to clear the bizarre picture. What the heck had that been? Maybe he needed more sleep or something. Something caught his attention again, right Evelyn!

He smiled back at her, "Yeah, talking isn't to bad. I can try and give you 'boy advice', but I make no promises on it's viability." Then Evelyn did the most awesome thing ever! She pulled out a book! Homework questions! Fantastic! Sensible things! His grin broke out across his face, "Absolutely!" He then proceeded to allow her to lead the way through her problems to help her sort them out while doing his level best to avoid the dreaded 'mansplaining' thing as much he could.

2 Gary Harper Life, expect the unexpected? 1404 0 5