Manfred Bulla
April 01, 2009 1:08 PM
End of Year Concert by Manfred Bulla
It had been the ready made seating capacity that had decided it. Combined with the extensive amount of room and the skills of the elves in somehow putting up a proper curtain, a well sized stage and some nifty little Charms that he was quite proud of, which made every sound from the stage clearly audible in every seat on the field (and some in the lower stands that were being used for overflow). The Elves had done the school proud, really. Manfred made a mental note to ask Paul Simon to pass on his thanks and congratulations on a job well done to the Elvish horde who worked behind the scenes so well to not only make things like this happen (or at least easier) but keep the school running smoothly at regular times as well.The students were taking their seats, in houses rather than simply anywhichwhere. Manfred watched them, thinking.
Time passed while he watched the students finish assembling, and all of a sudden there was a tugging on his robes and he looked down to see an Elf.
"Sir Headmaster should be starting the concert," the elf said in a stagewhisper, eyeing the students with what were definitely nervous glances. Manfred nodded, and climbed the stairs to the stage.
The charms already in place meant that a Sonorus wasn't necessary, but Manfred still waited a moment before he started to talk.
"If it's all the same with you, I think we'll start with an announcement I'm sure you've all been waiting for. The House Cup. In fourth place, with a worthy score of 205," if he was disappointed, Manfred masked it well, "Teppenpaw. In third place, with an excellent score of 213, Pecari." Mims, he knew, would be well pleased about that, if not so much about the next part. "In second place with the well earned score of 290, Crotalus. And I'm sure all our Aladrens know what that means! If The Head Boy, Head Girl, Prefects and Quidditch Captain would like to join me..." He didn't think it would take them long to arrive, and he was quite correct. A couple of elves came onto the stage, tottering over with a cup that they could both have easily have taken a bath in, and presented it to the gathered students. "Congratulations Aladren. 303 points is indeed a considerable amount of points to amass. Feel free to take back the cup to show your housemates what their efforts over the past year have earned."
With a gesture, however, he kept Christobel and Izabella on the stage.
"The second announcement is, of course, the new Head Boy and Head Girl for next year! Firstly, before I call those students to the front, I would like to thank Christobel and Izabella for the exemplory job they have done. You two have done both your house and the school proud with your conduct over the past year, and I wish you - and the rest of your yearmates - the very best with your lives beyond Sonora in the years to come." He paused a moment after saying that, a slightly off focus look on his face before he snapped back to the topic at hand. "Professer Powell? If you could join me?" He waited for his now official Deputy (Kiva had talked to him recently, and given him her decision not to return to that position of responsibility) to join him on stage, taking the time to take a small box from his pocket and open it, to take out the interim Head Boy and Head Girl badges.
"Would Mr Geoffrey Layne of Aladren and Miss Briony O'Leary please join us on stage?" Again there was the pause while he was joined on the stage by the two students called up. "Congratulations," he said to them, when they reached the stage, "you two have been chosen by your peers to be Head Boy and Head Girl of Sonora Academy next year." He was immensely pleased to see a Teppenpaw getting the position for the first time in some years. He handed the badges to Sadi to formally pin them on the two students. "It is, as the position of Prefect is, a position of great responsibility and privillage, and I'm sure that these two will do the school proud, in the tradition of Head Boys and Girls before them." He shook all the students hands before letting all four leave the stage, but asked quietly (but still, thanks to the charms audibly to all the audience) for Professor Powell to remain on stage.
"I have one final announcement to make before I let Mr Tellerman take over proceedings," Manfred nodded at the Groundskeeper who was waiting in the wings, and who would MC the event. Manfred, now that the moment had come, found he didn't have the words. He looked down at the stage, blinking a few times, and then up at the sky. The stars were so bright, even though the sun had only been gone a short time. He looked at them fiercely, trying to imprint the image of the clear sky and the multitude of stars into his memory.
The was a slight touch on his sleeve, and Manfred closed his eyes before opening them again.
"I'm sure you've all noticed Mr Jenkins around the school this past year. He was here for the Council, collecting data for them about the school and, as it turned out, me." He wondered why he was being so free with information. It felt odd, even as it came easily to him. "I've been made an offer I can't rightly refuse," he said. "Which means that this is my last year at Sonora. I'll be going to work for the Council, next year. Professor Powell will be taking over as your new Headmistress. I trust," Somehow, he managed to fix the crowd with an expression that few students wouldn't think was directed directly at them personally, "that you will all continue to work hard in your studies and do your school - and your new Headmistress - proud."
He paused, then nodded slowly.
"But for now, I believe we have an end of year concert to witness. Mr Tellerman, if you would like to start proceedings?"
OOC: You read that right, folks. I'm off and Sadi is taking over. It's been a grand few years, but all good things must come to an end, and I have high hopes that this transition will lead to even better times for you all and for Sonora. Best of luck to her and her chosen deputy, and I hope you all continue to enjoy your time here at Sonora.
Regards,
-Kat (aka Manfred)
Subthreads: Teppenpaw Solo by Paul Simon Tellerman with Afton Stokes
Pecari Solo by Simon Tellerman
Crotalus Group Act by Simon Tellerman with Crotalus
Aladren Group Act by Simon Tellerman with Aladrens
Aladren Solo by Simon Tellerman with Geoffrey Layne
Crotalus Solo by Simon Tellerman with Anabel McIntosh
Pecari Group Act by Simon Tellerman with Saul Pierce, Holly Greer, Elly Eriksson, Mike Song
Teppenpaw Group Act by Simon Tellerman with Teppenpaws
Catching Geoff L. Afterwards by Saul Pierce with Geoff Layne
39
Manfred Bulla
End of Year Concert
2
Manfred Bulla
1
5
Simon Tellerman
April 01, 2009 8:56 PM
Crotalus Group Act by Simon Tellerman
"That's Meredith Lail, folks! Let's give her a big hand."The curtain was closed behind him and underneath the sound of the applause, he could just make out the sounds of people moving around and talking quietly as Crotalus prepared to put on the first of the group acts.
He let the applause go on a moment or two longer than he would have if a soloist was up next, but waiting too long would only make the crowd impatient.
"Next up is the group act from Crotalus. This group was organized by Lila St. Martin, written by Laurie Cider, and showcases the talents of Helena Layne, Geoffrey Spindler, Josh Santoro, Laurie Cider, Gwen Carey, Adelita Garcia, Lila St. Martin, Earl Valentine, Amelia Smythe, and Charlotte Abbott. I invite you all to put your hands together for the Crotalus remake of Romeo and Juliet! Crotali!"\r\n\r\n
1
Simon Tellerman
Crotalus Group Act
14
Simon Tellerman
0
5
Crotalus
April 30, 2009 4:41 PM
Romeo and Juliet - Act I, Part I by Crotalus
The irony of the moment wasn't lost on her, as Laurie moved to the front of the darkened stage, straightening the enlarged name-tag on her chest that read Professor Baer. That she was playing the roles of the two professors who most intimidated her was no small thing. There was also the fact that despite many hours of practise, her New York accent was still terribly lacking. Still, the play was supposed to be funny, so she could only hope that the worse it was, the better.Hopefully.
There was no time for further considerations as suddenly she was bathed in a bright light and began to send her badly-accented voice over into the audience.
"Four households, all alike in dignity
(In fair Sonora, where we lay our scene),
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal imaginations of these four foes
A pair of star-crossed lovers do bad things with their life,
Whose misadventured (yet hopefully entertaining) overthrows
Doth with their hijinks bury their houses’ strife.
The fearful passage of their oft-marked love
And the continuance of their students’ rage,
Which, but with large amounts of silliness, naught could remove,
Is now the-"
With an exaggerated exactness, she raised a pocket watch to her eyes.
"Is now the forty-three minutes and twelve second traffic of our stage- that is, pitch-
The which, if you with patient ears attend,
What here shall miss, our toil shall strive to mend."
The light dimmed back into darkness, and she fought back the urge to inhale sharply. The charm was still in place after all- plus, she needed to focus on donning her 'Flatt' wig, coke-bottle glasses, and cigar. The light re-appeared across the stage, hi-lighting the actors playing Professors O'Leary and Taylor. She spoke carefully, mindful to inch her way to her new position beside the faux Professor Powell. "Meet the fair Houses of Teppenpaw and Pecari, with their ever more fair heads, the Professors O'Leary and Taylor."
Even after a good deal of rehearsing, Amelia still couldn’t figure out how a slightly overweight second year girl was supposed to pull off a convincing Professor O’Leary. Of course, as they’d progressed with this truly bizarre play, she’d been increasingly sure that this didn’t matter. As the lights rose on her, wearing a black bat-like robe and with her blonde hair hidden away under a dodgy O’Leary wig, and Lila as Professor Taylor, Amelia fell into character. “We Pecenpaws know how to have a good time,” she told the audience in a deep voice (that sadly didn’t sound at all like her character), as she spread her arms, allowing the robes to spread in a fashion most reminiscent of a vampire. “We aren’t afraid of taking risks. More importantly, we’ve produced the best Quidditch players for several generations.” She’d initially been somewhat wary of speaking this line, considering the Crotalus Quidditch captain was a lead role in the concert, but any concerns were quickly forgotten in the interest of showmanship. “We far outstrip the Croladrens,” Amelia finished with a flourish.
Professor Lorraine Taylor always seemed to wear slacks, which proved something of a problem for her portrayer. Lila St. Martin did not wear pants. Ever. That was just that. So, for the purposes of her role as the matriarch of the Pecenpaws, Professor Taylor was in a dark knee-length skirt that actually belonged to Allie. Shying away from “O’Leary” with a pained, long-suffering expression after his exposition on the virtues of “their House”, Lila stepped forward for her first line, denouncing the Croladrens. “They’re always so cold,” she complained. “So prim and repressed. Plus, they all think they’re better than everyone else, when they’re so not.” That last bit sounded much more like Lila St. Martin than Lorraine Taylor; she had never liked Aladren House.
Laurie paused long enough to allow 'O'Leary' to show off his vampire like cloak and the terse nervousness of 'Taylor,' while the two exchanged a brief declaration of themselves. A second light appeared overhead, and she stuffed the cigar into her mouth, nearly choking on the realization that it was a real one- and just who had come up with that brilliant idea?- and she continued, hoping that her lips didn't move too much. "And here we have the ever lauded House of Aladren and Crotalus, their heads joined in equally as lauded marital bliss."
As previously suggested, she made a show of glaring and scratching her protruding stomach, while 'Powell' glowered with a handful of runes. "Where's my food?" Laurie-as-Flatt cried, attempting for a growl. 'Flatt' was promptly answered with a rune to the head. Charlie was disappointed to not be dancing the solo for Crotalus, but she got that she was just a first year, and Anabel was pretty good, anyway. It was a consolation prize to be in the group act, but Charlie was still enjoying herself. In costume of plain brown robes and her hair tied in a neat knot, Charlotte thought she even looked a bit like Professor Powell, in minature. Plus getting to throw runes at older students on stage was not an opportunity to be missed.
A third light landed on stage, and the first two returned to darkness. The light displayed the obvious re-enactment of Coach Fox in full Quidditch gear, brandishing her broom and the school medic, Nicolas Wolfe inspecting his robes and frowning.
Hurriedly, Laurie discarded her Flatt props and returned to the narrator's corner, tucking her blond hair back under and slapping on the name-tag, terrible New York accent still intact. "More importantly though, meet our fated ones: Amy Fox, the darling Quidditch pro reared and regarded dearly by the Pecenpaws and Nicolas Wolfe, the wunderkind medical genius whose fastidious ways were guarded by the Croladrens.”
Taking her cue from the light falling on her, Helena struck a dramatic pose and began waving her broom around. It had been suggested that she try spitting while doing this, but there were limits to what she was willing to do in the name of fun and showmanship. People she knew were watching this, and one of them was her brother, the Head Boy elect (a fact she had yet to completely wrap her mind around).
As the spotlight picked him out, Geoff took a deep breath and made a great show of picking nonexistent lint off the pristine robes he was wearing. He studiously ignored the audience and Helena, over the other side of the stage, but the increasing pinkness of his face gave him away.
"So please, dear Audience, do watch and listen as we recount the fateful story of dearest Fox and her faithful Wolfe, er- Wolfe-io."
The stage returned to full darkness once more, and Laurie got out of range of the stage sound amplification charms before releasing the nervous cough that had sat in her chest during the entire opening. She was clear for a while yet- time to get the Flatt gear back in place.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Helena concentrated hard on not seeing the audience she was making a colossal fool of herself in front of. She was going to murder Lila and Laurie when this was over. “Boys!” she declared, leaning on her broom. “I say ‘boys’ because none of them ever grow up – they just get taller. They’re all such babies, always all about ‘look at me’, and ‘take care of me’. None of them understand me the way my broom does. My broom is the only one that understands me at all.”
She looked morosely down at her broom for a moment. “Flying around the Pitch, that’s the only way to spend one’s time.”
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
With only a second's hesitant glance at the audience, trying to spot Wolfe and hoping like anything that the Medic wasn't there Geoff stopped thinking that and wished whole-heartedly that the whole staff would spontaneously disappear. He wondered how he had been convinced to take the lead and then remembered the lack of male volunteers to help. He glanced at Helena, colored even more furiously and tried to throw himself into the role and not think.
At least it wasn't hard to come up with things to say in this instance. Years with his mother certainly had their uses sometimes.
"Women and Quidditch - Quidditch in general!" He stuttered a little at first before warming to the role. Sniffed in an exaggerated fashion, and already feeling a little less silly, he continued. "Brings out all sorts of uncouth sorts. Port and Cheese! That's the ticket, a civilized way to spend ones time." Geoffrey realized a moment too late that he'd forgotten his prop bottle of port and was incredibly glad as the light dimmed again.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
When the lights came back up, Helena was perched, rather awkwardly, in a tree, throwing rocks aimlessly at the ground. Beneath the tree, a safe distance away from the falling rocks, was Gwen Carey, her hair all pinned up under a beret. Trying not to laugh hysterically at the sight of one of the prettiest girls at Sonora pretending to be a man – a task made much harder by the fact that Gwen had always practiced as herself – Helena called down, “Paul Simon, I am not going to this stupid party. Give it up.”
Gwen craned her neck to see Helena properly, only just stopping herself from flinching as a passing rock got way too close to her eye for comfort. “Come on, Amy,” she drawled, her attempt at lowering her voice to match the groundskeeper’s exaggerating her accent without making her sound any more like a man than she usually did, which was to say not at all. “It’ll be fun.”
Helena threw another rock. “Will not.”
“Will so,” Gwen cajoled her, really wishing she would leave off with the rocks. “There’ll be lots of food, and people to beat up.”
Helena tilted her head, “considering” this. “Okay, fine,” she said, throwing all her remaining rocks at once. “I’ll go. But I am not dancing!” She jumped down from the tree, which precipitated a minor crisis. While she managed, as rehearsed, to land on her feet, she was just enough off that she knocked Gwen, who hadn’t been expecting it, over. The older girl went down with a most un-masculine yelp.
Her face burning red, Helena thought as fast as she ever had in her life. “Wow, Paul Simon,” she said. “You’ll sure impress the girls with that move.”
Gwen got back to her feet and managed a pained smile, over which she gave Helena a murderous glare. “I know, right?” she said, in her own voice. “Let’s go.” With that, she hauled Helena off stage with more force than was strictly necessary. As Geoff and Adelita exchanged lines, she muttered under her breath, “Lila St. Martin is going to wish she’d never been born after this.”
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Geoffrey was already midway through stowing some vials on a shelf when the sides of the stage switched illumination. He put them away with overdone care to order before starting to rolls swaths of bandages neatly. Behind him was Adelita-as-Tarquin.
"Tea?" Geoff/Wolfe asked, looking up from his task. "Oh, it's you, Tarquin. No, no, I'm busy. Can't you see I've got a lot of work to do? There might be a medical emergency! What? Oh, I'm sure your cat is alright. o, no no. Seriously, I'm quite happy here. And besides, I daresay they won't have any quality port there. Butterbeer and other uncouth drinks. Firewhiskey, I shouldn't wonder. Besides. I have work- I'm sure there will be plenty of hot men- Yes, but you see I'm not interested in- Oh fine, fine. Anything to shut you up! I'll come."
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Geoffrey entered stage left, clutching a medical bag and wincing at the "noise" of the party, like he imagined that Wolfe would do. He glanced at Tarquin.
"See your, er, your man?" he asked, turning red again as he hoped that the Librarian wasn't in the crowd. He didn't hold out much hope, however.
At Geoff’s question, Lita looked disappointed as her ‘man’ was not at the party. The look quickly vanished, however, when she spotted a display of tea and quickly wandered away from Geoff to have a closer look.
"Right," Geoff said. "Well." He looked around at the revelers, with more than a hint of distaste. "Lovely!" The sarcasm positively dripped, and Geoff felt like he was really getting the hang of this - he'd even stopped turning red every time he was in the light.
He moved towards the side of the room and started fiddling around with the gauze in his pocket. It had been specially altered before the play to hold a simply ridiculous amount and it was just about now that that became obvious, as he started pulling it out of his pocket and attempting to wrap it into rolls to pack away into the medical bag.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Acting natural at a party was one of those things Helena did not know how to do. This was at least in part because she’d never been to anything like the sort of party she was pretending to be at; even Crotalus victory parties, when they happened, tended to be kind of subdued. Luckily for her, “Fox” wasn’t supposed to be having fun; she was supposed to be trying, largely in vain, to fend off her stalkerish would-be boyfriend, Patrick Jenkins. Helena really hoped Josh never decided to take up a career as a stalkerish would-be boyfriend.
“Listen,” she said finally, reaching the correct spot on the stage and turning on him. “Stop following me around. I’m starting to get creeped out he – “ halfway through the word, she knocked over a vase strategically placed for that very purpose. It fell with a clatter, and she grabbed her arm as if injured. To defer Josh’s fluttering, she said, loudly, “It’s just a flesh wound!” Did anyone actually say things like that? She felt ridiculous. “Really. Just – “ She looked up, met Geoff’s eyes, and fell dramatically silent, secretly trying not to laugh. This was so absurd.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Geoff felt most of his composure and growing confidence in his ability to do this role - in front of this audience - leave as Helena looked at him after her line and his face flushed bright red. He promptly dropped everything and scrambled around to pick it up and make his way over.
"That looks bad," he said, not really looking at her arm at all. He started to cover it in gauze, awkwardly and with none of the precision he had brought to the role thus far (for the main part, at least), especially now that he was in front of an audience and he realized that Coach Fox had to be out there too.
Wait. No. That was wrong. He'd forgotten something. Geoffrey fumbled his wand out of another pocket and his eyes met Helena's.
Hell, she was going to laugh. "It might be serious," he insisted. "You probably should take some pepper-up or- er... something. I'm sure I've got some around here somewhere," he started to go through the medical bag he had been carrying.
Regaining her composure, Helena raised her eyebrows. “Pepper-Up?” she asked. "For a scratch? Where in your class did you graduate from the Healer's Academy, anyway?"
"Top," Geoff said. "With honors," He added. "Are you claiming to know more about this than me? You're a Quidditch player for Merlin's sake. You need to have pepper-up because.... er... because," Geoff dried and froze for a moment. "Because," he said, recovering. "you look a little peaky. Probably shock."
"Peaky," Helena repeated. "I look peaky. Because that vase is so much more damaging than a Bludger that I've gone into shock. " She shook her head. "And you Croladrens claim to be smart."
"I should rub some of this in as well," he said, pulling a jar marked 'Bruise Balm' from the bag, ignoring her completely and starting to unscrew the lid.
“There is nothing wrong with me,” Helena insisted. “Just…go away, won’t you?”
Geoffrey shook his head.
"Trust me," he said. "I'm a medic." And he wrapped her arm even more, slowing down to savor the process as he slowly mummified her arm.
“I thought you were a Healer,” she said, sounding more than a little inane. Absurd? ‘Awkward’ was suddenly a better word. It had to be the audience or…something.
16
Crotalus
Romeo and Juliet - Act I, Part I
0
Crotalus
0
5
Crotalus
April 30, 2009 4:44 PM
Romeo and Juliet - Act I, Part II by Crotalus
“I thought you were a Healer,” she said, sounding more than a little inane. Absurd? ‘Awkward’ was suddenly a better word. It had to be the audience or…something.Gwen came on stage at that point and did an exaggerated double take at the sight of “Wolfe”. Hands on her hips, she marched over to Laurie in her Flatt wig. “What’s going on with that?” she demanded, pointing to the happy, gauzy couple. “He’s not supposed to be here.” She paused. “Wait, dude, you’re not supposed to be here.”
Laurie gulped internally; while the play was intended to allow for improvisation, she wasn't the best at it really. Still, though, in proper fashion, she adopted a (hopefully) Flatt-esque expression of seriousness and stuffed the cigar back into her mouth. "You mean you didn't hear? I brought the karaoke machine."
“Karaoke?” Gwen said, suddenly brightening and forgetting all about the gate-crashers. “Excellent!” She headed off the for the indicated corner while the spotlight switched back to Geoff and Helena, the latter of whose arm might never be the same by the time she got all that gauze off.
16
Crotalus
Romeo and Juliet - Act I, Part II
0
Crotalus
0
5
Crotalus
April 30, 2009 4:48 PM
Romeo and Juliet - Act II by Crotalus
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"So, dearest Audience, our fated ones have finally met: the dashing Wolfe, heroic with his handy gauze, and the devilish Fox, ever devious with her non-wounds." Laurie reminded herself to slow down, her breath still short from the quick costume change; once again, she was in Professor Baer regalia. "But all does not bode well for our couple: Jenkins seeks Fox's Quidditch hand for his own, and Wolfe is out of nearly twelve feet of gauze. Will a night-time visit by his darling Fox help him in his re-stocking? Let's watch and see."
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Balancing on a stationary broom while holding rocks with one hand and throwing them with the other wasn’t exactly easy, but neither was it especially harder than passing a Quaffle while the same broom was speeding. As Helena had some experience with that, her main worry was that she’d accidentally concuss Geoffrey before he could say his lines. Finally the “window” broke and what was left opened, allowing her to stop throwing rocks at him.
The stage had been altered to reflect a pristine bedroom. Sitting in front of a set of drawers with the bottom one open and a pile of rolled up socks to one side, Geoffrey/Wolfe took great pains to put them in a very specific order - despite them all being exactly the same. There was a smashing sound, and Geoff ducked hurriedly as the "prop" rock nearly hit him square on the noggin. He scowled for a moment, but remembered to stay in character and not complain about health and safety. Until he remembered he was Wolfe.
"You should be more careful," he said, getting up and looking through the broken "window", and then peering further down to where Helena was hovering on her broom. He used his wand to open the window, so he could see her better and, to avoid being cut by the broken glass while he continued to speak. "Aside from the dangers of broken glass - lacerations, cuts - you could have done me a serious injury, and I'm the medic! It's all very well and good for you, not that you should be doing anything that might endanger- You know there are anti-flying charms around here, don't you? It's very dangerous to be flying when there are charms like that around. You could be seriously injured."
“I don’t care!” she called up, in what sounded more like schoolyard taunting than the Quidditch coach. “Lonely up there, Wolfe?” A major problem in this scene had been having no idea how to hit on anyone as Helena Layne, much less as Amy Fox. “Because I could totally come keep you company!”
Geoffrey shook his head. Helena was devoutly glad she couldn’t make out his expression under the bright lights and with the distance. “Listen, Miss Fox,” he said. “Your interest is – I mean to say, I really, er, don’t think we have that much in common.”
“Well, I – “ she began, then cut herself off as the character broke the anti-flying wards. Pretending to crash was considerably harder than doing the real thing, so it was lucky she didn’t actually have to slam into the stage. Pretending to be summoning-charmed through the window was easier.
“I think I hurt myself again,” she informed him, proffering her perfectly intact arm. Geoff took out his wand to summon gauze.
“You know,” he said. Helena carefully looked a little past him, for both their sakes, “You are somewhat attractive.”
As her arm was, once again, being wrapped in an excessive amount of gauze, she leaned in as if she were going to kiss Geoff, hoping the angle hid the fact she was blushing. It was one thing to tell her brother she was going to spend the entire act making out with someone just to see his expression, but it was quite another to actually be forward, even if it was in character. In the background, the door slammed open, ending the “moment”.
“Wolfe, I need some Sober-Up potion, immediately,” Charlie said with her arms folded, trying to look more imposing than she felt barging in on two much older students. She cast a disdainful look at Helena, but otherwise ignored her. “Flatt’s been on the Firewhiskey again,” she complained, wondering whether they would get into trouble for implying the History of Magic professor was always toasted.
"Stop all of that talking woman and get me my cigar!" Laurie yelled in her best drunk!Flatt impression.
Ignoring the exchange, Helena Summoned her broom and flew back out the window, managing to hit her head in the process. At least the lights went down at almost the same time and it wasn’t real stone.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Adelita stood near Geoff, watching him silently for a moment as though contemplating something important. “Now, as a mother, I have much wisdom to give.” Lita informed the Wolfe imposter. “Amy and you should really have a meeting with the Headmaster, Professor Flatt, and Professor O’Leary to discuss running your relationship by the administration.” Lita wasn’t quite sure why Flatt and O’Leary had to be present, but she assumed that was there just for something the audience could laugh at.
Geoff looked up from cleaning his shoes, his wand still pointed at them. “The solution you propose is quite flawed,” he pronounced. “Professors Flatt and O’Leary hate each other, and the Headmaster is hardly going to approve of coworkers…dating.”
At that point, Helena made her entrance. Her Crotalus Quidditch robes weren’t quite what the Coach would actually wear, but considering how difficult it was to manage the scenes where she was and wasn’t supposed to be dirty, she thought she could be forgiven for not going all-out on her costume. This was a scene where she was supposed to be dirty and hitting on Geoff, making it doubly uncomfortable.
“Well, I’m here, Wolfe,” she said, trying for a suggestive smile and turning about the same shade of red as her robes. This had been awkward in rehearsal; with an audience, it was excruciating. “What did you want me for?”
At the sight of the more aggressive Fox, Wolfe’s nerve failed him. Instead of trying to frame an answer to that, Geoff hurried to try to hide behind Adelita. Since he was considerably taller than her, that didn’t work out too well.
Adelita was amused by the fact that Geoff had to cower behind her. She wasn’t even 5 feet in height and was a petite thing that the wind could probably blow her over if it blew hard enough. “I’m a mother,
you know.” She commented lightly while the two of them went back and forth.
Helena shook her head as Geoff retreated behind Adelita. “Nicolas,” she said sternly, “this is not going to work if you keep avoiding me. Are we in a relationship or are we not?” A relationship. She should win an award for ‘most awkward phrasing’ or something.
“You can’t blame me for being worried about the repercussions,” Geoff argued back. “I’d rather not be fired, you know. And besides – “ he remembered to pause dramatically – “you’re all…dirty.”
“The two of you should get married.” Adelita suggested to the two of them. “Then no one can do anything about it.”
Geoff gaped at Adelita’s suggestion. “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he said. “What would people think? A Croladren and a Pecenpaw?”
“And we just met,” Helena sputtered, crossing her arms. “I mean, I know we work together, but – he’s a Croladren, and I’m a Pecenpaw. We’ve never interacted before the other night.”
“You know, as a mother-“ Lita stopped in mid-sentence as the interruptions from Helena and Geoff came about.
“Fine, fine!” Geoff interrupted the first year, throwing up his hands to avoid hearing any more of the lecture. “I’ll marry her.”
At the same time, Helena threw up her hands. “All right, all right,” she said. “We’ll get hitched.” That said, they looked at each other incredulously as the lights went down.
16
Crotalus
Romeo and Juliet - Act II
0
Crotalus
0
5
Crotalus
April 30, 2009 4:55 PM
Romeo and Juliet - Act III by Crotalus
Despite having gone through the entire story too many times to count, the silliness still got to her. It was with a voice heavy with laughter that she re-appeared on stage, her Professor Baer name-tag slightly askew. "Love is in the air- and sometimes it falls as well, it seems. Fox loves Wolfe, and Wolfe seems to love her back- and with Professor Kiva on their side, what could possibly stop them now?" She paused, acting as if waiting for an answer. "You mean beyond the fact that Flatt and O'Leary hate each other and would rather see their bodies torn asunder than find them trading love letters over the breakfast table? Let's wait and see how our faithful couple manages this challenge."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Gwen didn’t personally think the library set looked all that much like the Sonora Academy Library, but to be a set thrown together in under a minute, it wasn’t bad. And considering just how unlikely it was that the librarian would ever let anyone, staff or not, sing karaoke at the circulation desk, it didn’t really seem to matter much. She knew nothing about music, which made hitting wrong notes for Adelita to spill tea over much easier.
Newlyweds were supposed to be happy, and Nicolas Wolfe was supposed to be a happy newlywed. So Nicolas Wolfe, when he entered the library to discuss this development with his good friend Tarquin, was smiling broadly in spite of the facts that he never smiled and Gwen Carey couldn’t play karaoke to save her life.
Gwen looked at the smiling Geoffrey indignantly. “What’s your problem?” she demanded. “You don’t like my music? You mocking me?”
Adelita, who had been sitting at the ‘back’ of the stage holding a stuffed cat and pretending to spill tea everywhere during Gwen’s solo, stood and as awkwardly as she could tried to intervene between the two of them, “Now, now, let’s remember that this is a library! Inside voices.”
“Oh, shut up, man,” Gwen snapped, then used her microphone to smash his teacup. At the sight of the smashed teacup, Adelita fell to her knees in silent agony over the lost substance.
Seeing that Paul Simon was a danger to himself (herself?) and others, Geoff-as-Wolfe whipped out a roll of gauze. Tying Gwen up with said gauze was both awkward because she was, well, a girl and painful because she didn’t fake-struggle very well and nearly elbowed him in the eye in addition to kicking him in the shin. Several times.
This was one of the parts Gwen hated. Not only because she had to let Geoff Spindler wrap her up in gauze – something that just seemed vaguely wrong – but because, as she “struggled” with the gauze, she was at serious risk of being trampled under the rush of Amelia, Charlotte, Lila, and Earl. Two of them, at least, had definite motive, and the other two were excitable little underclassmen.
“What’s going on?” Amelia bellowed, trying to make O’Leary as scary as the students rumored him to be. Noticing mummified Gwen, she pointed in an accusatory manner. “Look what’s been done to Paul Simon! I demand justice!”
Laurie rushed in as well, back in full Flatt mode. At her cue, she threw in the necessary quip. "And Tarquin's lost a damned good cup of tea- where's his compensation? Where's the justice there?"
Lila rolled her eyes. “Tea is such a weak beverage anyway,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest. “Go get a cup of coffee already.”
Joining in, Charlie put her hands on her hips and retorted to Lila, “Never mind the beverage – if you want to talk about weak then talk about teaching charms. It’s barely a subject.”
Earl didn't know how he ended up in this play. He had been convinced by Eavan that doing the sets would be fun. And that part had been. It was his first real foray into using magic for painting and drawing and it had definitely been interesting. But somehow Lila had coerced him into playing a small part. The Headmaster, nonetheless. The Headmaster who was no longer going to be the Headmaster after this year. It put a serious damper on the supposedly 'funny' part. And the wireless strapped to his back was awkward. At least he had the common sense to put a featherlight charm on it.
Earl burst into the scene, supposedly to see what the annoying screeches were. He pretended to look affronted at everyone arguing and at the loss of tea. “Now, calm down everyone,” he said almost too soothingly. He patted the wireless as though comforting it too. He turned to Geoff and tried his best to look stern. “This loss of tea is so egre—egre—bad...” he ad libbed because he still couldn't pronounce the word in the script.”...so bad that death is not good enough. Instead you shall be fired!” he ended with a flourish, pointing randomly into the distance. He patted his wireless for good measure. He glared at Geoff until he walked off stage. Okay, this was a little fun.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Helena was pretending to polish her broom when Adelita, once again her role as Professor Kijewski, came onto the Pitch set with the light. “Hey,” she said. “What’s up?”
Adelita gracefully made her way onto the stage. Like her other scenes as Professor Kijewski, her hair was done in massive curls while she donned capris and a tee-shirt. She was hoping her attitude was giving off the ‘Mother Nature’ vibe. “I have terrible news for you, Amy.” Lita tried to look as though she was about to give the news of death to Helena. “I’m still a single mother! No, wait, that’s not what I meant to tell you. I meant to say, Wolfe has been banned from Sonora for good.”
Laying aside her broom, Helena crossed her arms. “Well, that sucks,” she said. “Long-distance marriages never work out.”
Lita waived off Helena’s cynicism. “Non-sense! All we have to do is prove to the Headmaster just how important Wolfe is to the school.”
“Yeah, right,” Helena scoffed. “What are we gonna do, poison half the staff?”
Lita’s face lit up when Helena said poison. “Oh, that’s actually a good idea!” She hit her fist against the palm of her hand like she had seen her father do a thousand times when something came to him rather suddenly. “You should poison the school and then send for Wolfe to save everyone!”
“I’ve heard worse plans,” Helena said finally, deciding just not to deal with the weirdness of pretending to plan murder with a firstie. “Let’s do it.” With that, the lights fell on them and almost immediately came up on the group of O’Leary, Taylor, and Jenkins.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
“How about this,” Amelia suggested, still trying to maintain the lower voice she’d been using for O’Leary, but fearing it was getting worse by the line. “I promise to arrange a date between you and Coach Fox, on the condition that you can acquire for me some new decorations for my dungeon.” She frowned, knowing the expression would look more believable – and hence more amusing - on the real O’Leary. “I think the gloom and doom look might be on its way out.”
Josh sat in the chair, leaning secretively towards Amelia trying hard to act as though this were a common occurrence. He looked thoughtful for a moment at Amelia’s compromise before finally giving her an answer, “Alright, it’s a deal.”
As they negotiated, Lila leaned in to hear “O’Leary” and “Jenkins” as they made their deal. “I’ll go along with it if you’ll stop trying to figure out how to get into our common room,” she said, tossing her perfectly straight hair over her shoulder. “It’s frightening the students.”
She didn’t get the gist of the joke – Allie told her nothing about Teppenpaw, just as she told Allie nothing about Crotalus – but had stopped consciously thinking about what she was doing a long time earlier. If she hadn’t, she would have already fallen down gibbering over the fact that they were all highly likely to be expelled.
Offstage, Helena fake-sneezed violently, then said, “I’ve got a bad feeling about this…” while picking at her nails. The light moved off the second set of plotters and back to the narrator.
16
Crotalus
Romeo and Juliet - Act III
0
Crotalus
0
5
Crotalus
April 30, 2009 4:59 PM
Romeo and Juliet - Act IV by Crotalus
"Things seem to be heading down a dark path for our fated couple. Wolfe's been canned, Tellerman's been gauzed, and Fox is being setup for a blind date- what could possibly happen now that could be worse?" The requisite pause was given, Laurie fighting back a grin from the ridiculousness of her lines. "Wait, that's right. Kiva and Fox plan on poisoning the school in order to bring back Fox's lover-man Wolfe. And so a messenger is sent to Wolfe's hotel, to tell him of the plan. The messenger, it seems, though, is hardly reliable. Somehow, I don't think this bodes well. . . let's wait and see."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
To play the part of Professor Schmidt, Gwen had needed to get creative. The warped aspect of her, of all people, playing the ugliest human being she’d ever laid eyes on had appealed to her enormously, but…she wasn’t ugly in a normal way, much less an ex-Potions-Master way. And there was no way she was going to produce the effect magically – what if it got stuck?
The answer had come to her in a flash of inspiration, and that flash of inspiration was why she was wearing a very bad mask.
The lights came up on a hastily-assembled hotel-room scene, with Geoff Spindler circling job ads in a paper. Gwen, oversized robes thrown over her Paul Simon Tellerman costume but with her hair still pinned up under the same beret, strolled in casually, as though nothing at all urgent was afoot.
Geoff looked up in surprise at Gwen’s appearance. “Who – “ he began, then stopped. “Oh, I remember you. You’re that Potions professor who barely showed up before you left. What was up with that?”
“I’ve got this disease,” Gwen explained, gesturing blithely to her mask. “I can only appear for three lessons. Good for you that this all came up between the Advanced and Intermediate classes.”
Geoff laid down the newspaper slowly. “What is ‘all of this’?” he asked suspiciously. “Why are you here?”
Gwen wished she could screw her face up in thought, but that was a tad difficult when it was a stationary mask. Instead, she looked toward the ceiling, drumming her fingers against her thigh as she 'tried to remember'. “Oh, yeah! Amy Fox – the Quidditch Coach at Sonora? She got poisoned, and we need a cure.” She shrugged. “Guess there’s one thing John Fawcett can’t do, huh?”
Geoff sprang to his feet, upsetting his chair. “Dearest Amy!” he exclaimed. “I must go at once!” Not pausing to throw anything into a medical bag, or otherwise do anything rational or normal, he grabbed the huge roll of gauze sitting on the nightstand and ran offstage, leaving Gwen behind as the lights went down.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
When the lights came back up, Helena – still in Quidditch gear – was sitting behind a cauldron on the Pitch set, holding up a huge mock-book entitled How to Brew Bad Stuff. She looked up as Josh walked out on stage. “What do you want?” she asked, making it clear that what she wanted was for him to go away.
Josh stood with air of confidence. He was trying to portray what he thought a snake of a man would look like. He didn’t know if he was making his face right or making himself look like he was constipated. “O’Leary promised me a date with you.”
“Uh, no,” she said, lowering the prop enough to give him a derisive look. “O’Leary is not the boss of me, and I am not going on a date with you.”
“If you don’t go on a date with me…” Josh paused here for dramatic effect before giving Helena a sneer of a smile, “I’ll ban Quidditch.”
Helena gaped at him. “You - !” Remembering that she didn’t have a line there, she turned beet-red, then glared at him, snapped, “Fine!” and bent back over the cauldron, hoping to get herself back under control before she had to say her next line.
She didn’t, but the show had to go on. Once Josh was gone, she looked up from the cauldron, hoping the audience would take her flush for anger instead of embarrassment. “That’s it,” she told the audience solemnly. “I can’t wait any longer, and I certainly can’t go out with that idiot. I’ve got to move the poisoning up to tonight.”
16
Crotalus
Romeo and Juliet - Act IV
0
Crotalus
0
5
Crotalus
April 30, 2009 5:02 PM
Romeo and Juliet - Act V by Crotalus
Laurie made a mad sprint across the stage, arriving barely in time for the spotlight. Her Flatt wig hung haphazardly from her forehead, and the name-tag was barely legible. "A wrong message, a forced date, and an expedited timeline- oh my! What will happen now?" The light immediately extinguished, and she was back behind the curtain, shucking off the rest of the Baer-guise._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
When the focus moved away from the narrator and back to the main cast, Helena was at the back of the Cascade Hall set, her arms folded, an attempt at a deeply satisfied look on her face. The rest of the “staff” – or what of it wasn’t incapacitated from the library scene, anyway – was taking goblets. The original plan had been for “students” to drink the “poison”, but they’d run out of actors and had to make it a staff banquet. Picking up one as the tray came her way, Helena stood, drawing the attention of the group.
“I say we have a toast,” she said firmly. “To all of us!”
As she put her (untouched) cup back down, the doors burst open, revealing Geoff.
Geoff threw the doors open dramatically, letting them bang against the ‘walls’. The noise wasn’t quite what throwing the real Cascade Hall doors open would have been, which added something to the bizarre humor of the performance. “Amy!” he shouted. “Everyone, stop!” But it was too late.
At the sight of Geoff bursting onto the set, Amelia jumped to her feet, upending her goblet in the process. “He’s supposed to be fired!” she shouted, her bat-like robes billowing with every movement. “I say we kill him!” It was all getting a bit dramatic, and Amelia had to try very hard to stop herself from laughing.
Laurie threw her cigar on the ground with plain relish and roared out her one line. "Get me a new cigar!"
Lila, down the way next to their O’Leary, glanced at Charlotte and took out her prop wand, which she waved at O’Leary, the objective being for Amelia to pick up on the cue and fall over as if punched in the face. Charlotte followed suit, sending Flatt into silence. Earl stared at the beloved wireless, seemingly oblivious to the goings-on around him.
Hurrying to the front, Geoff, trying hard not to think, grabbed Helena’s arms. “Amy,” he said, “it wasn’t worth it. You didn’t have to do this. I – I was going to get a job in Tumbleweed.”
Helena stared at Geoff in mock-horror for a moment. “You idiot!” she wailed finally, grabbing the front of his robes and immediately wishing she hadn’t. Physical contact made it all seem more…real. “Don’t you see? I only travel by broom! That would take an hour’s travel time every time I went to see you!” She tore herself away. “We can’t do this, Wolfe. Our love will never survive!” With that, she snatched up her abandoned cup, downed it, and almost choked for real. She was not used to drinking that fast.
“He - Amy!” Geoff cried in horror as Helena choked. The last thing they needed was for his costar to die on stage. He scrambled for his lines. “Amy, that wasn’t hygienic!” As she fell to the ground, he fell to his knees beside her.
Coughing, she tried to look like she was slowly falling to the ground without actually falling, and ended up just kneeling normally, then falling sideways and catching herself on one hand. She really was not cut out for the whole damsel-in-distress thing, which was probably, come to think of it, why the only date she’d ever had was the garden scene with Geoff and Adelita.
Forgetting to stammer, but sounding a little strangled after almost choking on the “poison”, she looked at Geoffrey as adoringly as she could manage while still trying not to cough and blush and said, “You know, I really did – “ her plan to stop coughing failed – “like you.” She choked again, this time on a laugh at her next line. “Even if you are kind of wimpy.”
“And I really, really liked you,” Wolfe said, his portrayer somewhat assured that Helena was not in real danger. “Even if you are really frightening.”
As Helena attempted her dying act of reaching for her beloved Wolfe, Gwen, out of her Schmidt robes and mask and back in Tellerman mode, strode into the Hall, brushing superfluous bits of gauze off her arms. Since Adelita couldn’t exactly be two characters in two places on stage at once, it was her job to pick up a fallen goblet and sniff at it distastefully.
“You can cut the dramatics now, Fox,” she said. “You, too, Wolfe. And everybody. It was pretty vile, but it wasn’t poison.” She smirked at Helena. “Guess someone can’t read her potions book.”
Everyone began to cheer as Helena, recovering at last from her mishap with the drink, sat up and stared at Geoff. He stared back.
Earl interrupted, lifting his wireless above his head. "Fox. Wolfe," he said, in the overly soothing voice he associated with Bulla. "I have been truly touched by your attempted mass murder, and your trek across the desert to see her."
“Actually,” Geoff said, not taking his eyes off of Helena, “I hailed the wagons. Desperate times, desperate measures.”
"Oh this reminds me of my favorite radio drama as a child!" Earl exclaimed over-zealously. "The Loves of our Very Long Lives." Earl sighed dramatically as he took the wireless from over his head and clutched it to his chest, stroking it as he spoke. "I hereby re-hire you! As long as Fox promises not try her hand at mass murder again."
Josh, arms folded and looking very disheartened, booed loudly when Earl announced that Wolfe was rehired.
About that time, Gwen appeared to notice the karaoke machine randomly standing in one corner. “Karaoke?” she said, already heading for it. “Excellent!”
As everyone cheered again, Helena said, “Hey, Wolfe!” Oh, Merlin, she was already blushing. “I think I injured my lips!”
Tossing aside the Flatt props- the wig, glasses, and pillow-enlarged robes- Laurie held up the name-tag decrying her supposed name. "And they lived happily ever after. The end."
16
Crotalus
Romeo and Juliet - Act V
0
Crotalus
0
5
Paul Simon
May 06, 2009 10:41 AM
Thank you, Crotalus by Paul Simon
He'd been told it was a Sonora adaptation of Romeo and Juliet, he'd even announced it as such, but seeing the words on his index card and seeing it in performance were two very different things. He nearly fell off of his chair during the first scene. When 'Paul Simon' appeared at the party, he was slightly relieved that the Crotali seemed to like him. He even laughed and clapped when Gwen went off in search of a karoake machine. He would do that.He spent the next few scenes feeling bad for laughing at the foibles of his co-workers, and feeling secure in his own portrayal. And then Gwen started signing.
He really hoped that she was just on Saul's level of musical capability and that wasn't a scripted critique of his own skill.
Of course, considering what they were doing to the other staff, implying he couldn't carry a tune didn't seem that horrible.
He was secretly a little relieved that the Crotali students either hadn't picked up on his own flirting with Kiva, or just hadn't put it into the script. Every other secret the staff thought they had kept from the students had seemed to make it into the play.
He really hoped he hadn't been the source of most of the rumors that sparked the script. Of course, he might have spilled some beans to Saul, and Saul could have easily spilled them to whoever would listen.
The play did come to an eventual close, and Simon stepped out onto the stage again. "Thank you, Crotalus. That was . . . a certainly unique interpretation of Romeo and Juliet. I think I have to thank you: it never occurred to me to bring a karaoke machine to a staff meeting. The next one should be a lot more fun."
He waited for the chuckles from his joke to fade before going into his introduction for Aladren's group act.
1
Paul Simon
Thank you, Crotalus
14
Paul Simon
0
5