A little overdue, but here we go. on Labyrinth Gardens

Mia Kerova

May 16, 2007 3:51 PM

A little overdue, but here we go. by Mia Kerova

The Labyrinth Gardens was just one of those places. You went there to relax or to do homework or even to be in a writing group with your friends as the case may be. It was good for pretty much anything. So Mia was taking advantage of it being a place to think. Racing thoughts battered her brain. She still felt like she would snap at the first person to speak to her. She thought it was best to be alone for a while. Just to breathe. She hadn’t had much time for that as school had been in full swing since starting up again. She had done a fair job of maintaining grades and prefect duties and such while still being distracted by what was happening with her and Stephen.

Close to a month had gone by since midterm ended. Of course she had seen Stephen since, it just seemed like he had a million places he’d rather be. He looked so distracted. He had every right to be after the break, but a month of this was too much. Why was he avoiding her? Had she done something wrong? That was a thought she couldn’t shake no matter how ridiculous it seemed to her. She didn’t have enough time with him to do something wrong. That’s sure how it felt anyhow.

Maybe what happened was even worse than the paper described. It mentioned injuries, but the journalist couldn’t possibly know exactly what was happening at the time. Only Stephen and that psycho knew that. But why wouldn’t he talk to her? It was unnerving. He ought to know he could talk to her after a year. She figured at first he just needed some space and she could understand that. Everyone needed space at some point. She wasn’t at his side twenty four-seven. But a month later she didn’t want to deal with the space. There was just too much of it.

So she walked through the gardens to clear her mind and maybe organize her thoughts so they weren’t as scattered and in disarray. Or to just stop thinking about things that upset her and concentrate on happier thoughts. There was a wedding coming up in a few months. Even thinking about that and its irritating planning was better than the other turmoil. She wasn’t sure how long she had been walking. An hour maybe? She couldn’t be sure. Unconsciously she was sure she was looking for Stephen. Maybe he was using the Gardens for another of its useful purposes. But how was she going to find one person in the huge expanse of the Labyrinth Gardens?

Mia stopped and sat on a bench to rest her feet and stared off at nothing. Other thoughts entered her mind like what homework she ought to be doing. Wedding thoughts returned too. A few times her head turned to the perpendicular paths as people strolled along. So after seeing another person, she simply turned her head back to nothing, but she did a quick double take. Well speak of the devil. She sprung up and hurried to the corner, peaking around and seeing the retreating back.

“Stephen?” She called and went completely around the corner to see him. She stopped again, fingering her hair behind her ear unnecessarily. A nervous habit she had for years and would probably still have for years to come. “So is this where you’ve been hiding for a month?” She had the smallest hint of a smile not wanting to seem like she was attacking him, but otherwise she just looked concerned. She knew it, but she couldn’t help it. She wouldn’t apologize for caring.

0 Mia Kerova A little overdue, but here we go. 0 Mia Kerova 1 5

Stephen Baxter

May 24, 2007 9:55 PM

Fancy seeing you here, Miss Kerova by Stephen Baxter

He was clutching the brochure a little too tightly. Stephen made a conscious effort to loosen his grip to something resembling normalcy a little more and continued to hurry on. He was out of there, there hadn't been any confrontations. He could breathe again. He took a turn so that the group meeting was well and truly behind him. Paused for a moment and then hurried on again, making his way further into the maze.

“Stephen?”

Stephen froze mid-stride.

“So is this where you’ve been hiding for a month?”

Mia. What was she doing out here? Stephen turned, recalling the brochure in his hands as he did so, and folding it quickly to slip into a pocket. She was smiling, just a bit, and Stephen tried to ignore the other body language as it wasn't saying anything he wanted to hear. He resisted the urge to sigh or to say something inconsequential and then run off. It hadn't been helping, he reminded himself. Maybe there was no point.

"No," Stephen said. He stopped himself because he realised he sounded defensive then continued on, trying to sound more like himself. "I haven't been here that much. I've been in the library as well." This was going well. He'd given away both his retreats in one fell sweep. Well, two of them. There was always the spot under the Quidditch stands, but then that had other uses as well, which Mia knew (mostly because they tended to involve her). Which was why he hadn't been relying on it.

Despite his best intentions, Stephen sighed.

"What do you want, Princess?"

39 Stephen Baxter Fancy seeing you here, Miss Kerova 49 Stephen Baxter 0 5

Mia Kerova

May 26, 2007 11:44 AM

I'm glad you could join me, Mr. Baxter by Mia Kerova

Mia frowned a little more at Stephen’s tone. Unless she was being paranoid, because he sounded more like himself when he continued. Yet not even that sounded right. So he was hiding from her in the gardens and in the library of all places. She supposed there were plenty of other reasons to be in the library besides studying. She had found an interesting book or two that didn’t involve schoolwork or looking up more spells to add to the extensive list of spells she had taught herself.

"What do you want, Princess?"

Mia moved her eyes away from him even though she began walking towards him or at least down the path where he happened to be standing. She kept her eyes on the leaves that made up the walls of the labyrinth, letting her hand run over as she walked.

“To talk to you.” She stated simply. That was what she wanted, but it was also more than that. She couldn’t just blurt it out in one go though or he’d disappear again for sure. She stopped and began twisting at a stiff crooked leaf. “You always seem to disappear somewhere. I feel like I haven’t seen you since school started again.” A slight exaggeration. The leaf came off the wall in her fingers so she dropped it.

The last time Mia was in a bad way with someone, her frustration had gotten the better of her and it didn’t turn out well at all. She had no intentions of screwing this up, but she so wished she could jump straight from conflict to resolution without the tedious steps in between. Especially since the steps were varying and complicated. She turned back to look at Stephen and leaned against the wall.

“So will you talk to me and tell me what’s wrong?”

Of course she knew what was wrong, unless there was something more. That was very possible, but even with the obvious, she wanted him to tell her, not some stupid newspaper. She was tired of being left in the dark like she had been all vacation to her absolute frustration, and she was tired of him not speaking to her now that they were back.

0 Mia Kerova I'm glad you could join me, Mr. Baxter 0 Mia Kerova 0 5

Stephen

May 27, 2007 11:00 AM

Not at all, Miss Kerova by Stephen

He didn't make a move as Mia approached, watching her carefully instead. She was being so... careful. She wasn't looking at him, she seemed to be more concentrating on the hedges either side of them. It made him want to just... he wasn't sure what it made him want to do. Run off? Say something that would make her look at him. Her words made him stay. A point of pride probably, proving that he wasn't a complete coward, that he didn't always 'disappear somewhere'. Besides, of everyone at Sonora (if you didn't count Geoff), he supposed that Mia was the one he should be able to talk to. She was supposed to be his girlfriend, after all.

There was a seat nearby, but Stephen didn't bother to make his way to it. Instead he moved to the nearest wall and slumped down beside it, ignoring the sensation of the little branches poking into and scratching at his back as he slid down the last bit and sat with his knees pulled up against his chest. He wrapped his arms around them.

"What's there to talk about?" He asked. "I mean, clearly you know. Everyone knows, even if they don't say anything. I can feel it in the way they look at me. I don't want to be a pity case."

He rested his chin on his knees, looking fiercely up at Mia for a moment and then focusing on the hedge behind her with his expression barely relenting. One arm unwound long enough for his hand to reach back and rub at the back of his neck where one particularly pointy branch had been poking at it before he had let his head go forward but then it went back to its former position.

"I don't want to think about it at all, really," he continued after a moment, so quietly that it was unlikely that anyone not right beside him and listening carefully would hear his words clearly. "But it won't go away."

39 Stephen Not at all, Miss Kerova 0 Stephen 0 5

Mia

May 28, 2007 12:59 AM

And when do we lose formalities, Mr. Baxter? by Mia

It was such a strange thing to see. Stephen Baxter so…vulnerable. Sitting across from her with his knees pulled up. Despite that confident, hyper appearance he always held, like nothing in the world could touch him, he was still human. This was clear now. He even sounded defeated. When he mentioned how people look at him, Mia became conscious of her own expression. She was hoping for an understanding look rather than too sympathetic, but she knew the more she fretted over it, the harder maintaining any one look would be so she let it go. That wish for a direct path to resolution stayed at the front of her thoughts. Mia held his gaze and he was the first to break it this time. Her foot gave a small twitch like she was about to step forward, but she stopped when he spoke again, much quieter than before.

After a brief moment, she did move. She walked right beside where he was and lowered herself next to him. Maybe she was being selfish, wanting him to bring up what happened again. She knew what happened and now she knew why he was keeping away from her and everyone else. He had told her what she wanted to know and just sitting there and talking to him was what she wanted most. That suffocating silence over break was awful. Not just because she didn’t talk to him, but because something was wrong and she couldn’t talk to him.

Mia couldn’t put herself in his exact situation, but she thought she understood what he was saying. She didn’t want the sympathy and pity from her friends back home when her parents divorced. It had gotten to the point where she actually yelled at them for looking at her like that, but that was years ago and it seemed to belittle Stephen’s troubles. The point was she had wanted normalcy as fast as possible and for everything that happened to…go away.

“Stephen, people are going to look at you differently for a while. It’s human nature to feel bad when something happens to someone, especially someone you care about. If you keep avoiding them, then they’ll keep thinking something is wrong and they’ll keep worrying and giving you those pity looks.” In her mind she substituted ‘they’ for ‘I’ and ‘them’ for ‘me.’

“Ignoring what happened won’t make it go away, but moving on might make you feel better sooner. Not dwelling on it. Maybe getting some sleep.” She said, lightly brushing some of his hair aside to see his face clearly. Another reason ‘they’ worried was because he still didn’t look quite like himself. He looked tired and out-of-it and not like Stephen should.

0 Mia And when do we lose formalities, Mr. Baxter? 0 Mia 0 5

Stephen

June 05, 2007 10:04 AM

Ladies first, Miss Kerova by Stephen

"They shouldn't," Stephen muttered indistinctly. "And besides," he said, more loudly now, "I don't want them to worry about me. It's stupid. I can look after myself." Or I can now, he added silently. It wasn't going to ever happen again. Never again. He wasn't going to be caught and he wasn't going to be used against people he cared about and damned if he was ever going to be so much as in the same room as any of the people that he and Geoff thought were behind the whole thing. And if he had to be, he'd decided, he wasn't going to take it lightly. They'd learn a thing or two about what it was like to be locked up and starved and cold and hurt and scared. In fact he hoped he would meet them someday, just as soon as he'd discovered a way to lock them against their wills into one of his nightmares. See how they liked it.

But he'd much prefer that it had never happened, and with that not an option, his second preference was that he could forget it.

"Ignoring what happened won't make it go away, but moving on might make you feel better sooner. Not dwelling on it. Maybe getting some sleep."

Stephen flinched involuntarily at the word 'sleep', his eyes flicking away from the greenery to focus on Mia for half a second, before bouncing back to the wall, to Mia's hand brushing at his fringe, to the wall again, to her fingers and back to her face. He could read the worry there and he felt bad that she felt that way, but he also felt a surge of anger too. Wasn't she supposed to be his girlfriend? She should know that he didn't want that. She wasn't supposed to worry about him. He could look after himself. And sleep? He was getting enough. It wasn't like he was falling asleep in all his classes or sleeping in or anything like that. Sure he'd dozed off that one time, and that had been a totally boring class so it was completely justified. And if she'd been having nightmares like his, she'd understand that he'd have enough of sleep.

He reached down and pulled out the brochure, holding it up just long enough for her to see it before shoving it back in his pocket abruptly.

"I'm not ignoring it. I want to. I want it to go away, but you see? I'm not ignoring it. I'm going to try this Novelling thing and see if that helps. And I'm getting enough sleep - ask Ash if you have to, he'll back me up. I'm getting plenty of sleep and anyone who says any differently doesn't know what they're talking about." Stephen almost immediately regretted mentioning Ash. He was almost certain that Ash would be able to back him up, but even if he did, if Mia talked to him then... wait... no, Mia and Ash, they didn't talk. It was fine. Nothing to worry about.

He reached out and grabbed her hand, forestalling any more attempts to move his hair so she could examine him more closely. He took a breath, put on a smile that didn't quite reflect in his eyes and continued speaking, making an effort to sound like his old self, because maybe that would convince her that he wasn't there to be pitied or worried about.

"See? All under control. No need to worry."

39 Stephen Ladies first, Miss Kerova 0 Stephen 0 5

Mia

June 27, 2007 2:23 PM

Thank you for your patience, Mr. Ba---Oh, right. by Mia

Mia opened her mouth to say something, but shut it quickly afterward. She was going to say of course he could look after himself. That wasn’t the point. People still felt bad for him and they’d still give him the looks whether he wanted them to or not unless he told them not to and that made its own annoyances as she knew. If he didn’t like the looks, he wouldn’t like the obvious avoidance either. Either way, it all faded eventually. But saying anything else seemed very pointless. He was getting so defensive, Mia almost felt inclined to move over.

She glanced at the Novelling Fury brochure before he quickly pushed it back in his pocket and seemed determined to make her understand that he was being very proactive about everything that happened. She believed him, but he seemed dead set to make sure of it. Ask Ash? Stephen didn’t have her that worried. Going up to one of the Cravens would be a last resort, like if Stephen hadn’t come back to school at all.

Stephen took her hand and smiled, ending that direction of the conversation.

"See? All under control. No need to worry."

“Good. I’m glad.” Mia smiled back and gave herself kudos for how natural it felt on her face. It was good. She didn’t want to worry about him and she didn’t normally have to, but what happened wasn’t normal in the least. She knew though that nothing else would come from the previous conversation except a fight if either one lost their temper. She did hope he knew that if he wanted to he could talk to her. She looked at her hand while thinking how to casually steer the conversation elsewhere. Being wary of her words wasn’t something she wanted to do either. Why couldn’t things just be normal again? That Novelling brochure in Stephen’s pocket came to mind. It related while still moving on so it wasn’t an awkward jump to another conversation.

“I saw the flyers for that Novelling Fury thing. I heard it wasn’t so big last year. Only a few younger students went. More people showed up this time?” She didn’t doubt that the younger Pecaris could draw in a crowd. She didn’t doubt any Pecaris could draw a crowd if they really wanted to.

0 Mia Thank you for your patience, Mr. Ba---Oh, right. 0 Mia 0 5

Stephen

September 03, 2007 8:55 AM

I reckon you win the kudos for patience, Princess by Stephen

"Yeah," Stephen said, his temporary smile fading quickly as soon as he'd stopped thinking about its necessity. "Loads of people from what I could tell. Why-" he stopped himself abruptly. Even from where he was sitting it seemed a bit antagonistic, both the tone he was using and the unfinished (except in his head) question asking why if she was so interested in Novelling Fury she hadn't been at the meeting herself. He didn't want to make things worse.

He frowned at their joined hands for a moment before looking back up at Mia again.

"Sorry. I'm going to get over this. I have to. Otherwise he's won, hasn't he?"

The bleak note in his voice bothered Stephen, and his frown deepened again before he forcibly threw it off. He needed... a distraction. A different distraction to the ones he'd been using. His expression altered ever so slightly as he continued to look at Mia. He hadn't kissed her in... a long time. Since before Christmas. He'd always enjoyed it too, which was an added bonus. There was no one else around at the moment. He shifted his grip on her hand and lifted his other hand to brush the side of her face.

"Mind if we stop talking for a little now?" he asked, a hint of his old self causing the corner of his mouth to quirk, his eyebrow to raise itself quizzically and the hand holding hers to pull Mia off balance so she'd have no choice other than to fall in towards him. He didn't intend to let her actually answer. The hand on her face shifted around to the back of her head and the one holding her hand released its grip only to move around her back pulling her further off balance and towards him. He wasted no time, leaning slightly to close the rest of the distance between them, kissing her, firstly much like he had in times past (although his hand placement was far more chaste in both position and intent at the moment) but then deepening it, seeking something.

A feeling, a sensation, an escape.

Something.

Anything.

39 Stephen I reckon you win the kudos for patience, Princess 0 Stephen 0 5