Coffee on At Home

John Skies

January 19, 2021 5:18 AM

Coffee by John Skies

OOC: CW hospitals BIC:

John took a mouthful of the unpleasant, artificial subtance that was being called ‘coffee’ here. The thick, easily sterilised china clinked against his teeth, as he pondered the thing that occupied most of his mind right now:

Did hospital coffee genuinely taste worse than other cheap coffee?

Objectively, it was likely made of the same stuff that they served in run down beach cafes, Floo station waiting areas, and the like. The same brown powder that bore a relation so distant to the beans it had come from that it probably didn’t know about them. The same long-life creamer. It was all cheap coffee. It couldn’t really taste objectively any worse in any of those other places, but in them the promise of adventure pulled your mind away, lacing nuances into the flavour that weren’t really there. Here, there was only the coffee to think about. The tepid temperature, the slightly grainy feeling it had on his tongue. Each mouthful had his full focus, because it was a choice between filling his mind with this or thinking about the fact that his best friend might- was not doing so well right now.

When Selina came, she stayed with Leo. Anyone who didn’t know them would have said that was because she was his sister, John was just the in-law. It wasn’t like that though. Yes, Selina had some seniority here, had known Leo longer than he had, was a blood-relative… But John had known Leo longer than he’d known Selina. There were some ways he knew Leo better than he knew his own wife. Saw him more often too. Leo didn’t disappear off to a boarding school for days or even a week at a time. He came by every day.

Right now, John was returning that favour. He came by every day. He couldn’t sit at Leo’s bedside though. There were just some ways you didn’t need to see a person. All the spells shining around him, impersonal white walls, white bed covers, white everything. All personality stripped away and replaced with hospital issue this and that, the sharp sting of the sterilisation hanging in the air. And a still figure, eyes closed, something helping him to breathe- Leo wouldn’t want John seeing him like that, and that suited him fine because John didn’t want to either. He checked in with the healers. He dropped off family members who were too fraught to trust their own apparition or pronunciation skills. And he came up to the hospital cafe, drank terrible coffee, and snipped the cryptic crosswords out of two copies of the day’s paper, ready to add to an ever growing pile on the table in his living room. He tried not to let his eyes glance over the clues, tried not to let his brain get set whirring in motion. It wouldn’t be fair to get a headstart.

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been staring into half a cup of coffee, when a movement by the door caught his eye. He glanced up, finding himself catching the eye of someone he didn’t particularly want to see. No offence to Killian Row. It wasn’t really his fault that there was only one person John wanted to see walking into the room, and last he’d checked, he wasn’t likely to be up and about any time soon. John gave a gruff nod to the chair opposite him. If Killian had to be here, he’d rather they weren’t awkwardly sitting at opposite ends of the room, painfully aware of the other’s presence without any form of interaction. And he was probably a better distraction than half a cup of cold coffee.

“Grab yourself a drink, and grab a seat,” he invited, his voice coming out gravelly. He suspected it might have been a while since he’d used it at all, and even longer since he’d done more than the perfunctory basics with it.

“You brought Ema,” he summarised when Killian joined him. He knew Selina had sent Killian a note suggesting he picked her up from the Portkey station, and he suspected she hadn’t wanted to come alone, or wanted someone she could come lean on when she was done visiting her uncle, and seeing for herself that he had no idea she was there. “She’s alright?” he checked, mostly meaning that she’d arrived back in one piece, and wasn’t any more of a mess than could be expected right now. He let Killian get enough syllables out to answer that question but was ready to jump in before he got too far into commenting on Leo, or before it got turned back on him. “And you? How’s work?”

13 John Skies Coffee 0 John Skies 1 5

Killian Row

January 19, 2021 11:13 AM

I'll take it. by Killian Row

Killian wasn't entirely sure what was going on but he knew it was bad. In small ways, he could empathize with how the Skies family might be feeling. In this scenario, he was Selina - she was struggling with an illness hurting her brother - and Ema was Bonabelle - she was struggling with danger to her uncle. Although if that were the case, Killian supposed he was not Selina but Selina's brother. That made it harder to empathize though as he was pretty sure Lorcan would not care too much if something happened to him.

He'd picked up Ema and the bitterness of the circumstances couldn't quite spoil their reunion, although it was far from ideal of course. It was odd because he felt like he knew her very well, but he also knew he hadn't actually been around her that much. Not enough to know whether she preferred hugs and physical affection or space when she was worried, not enough to know if she was more likely to fidget with her sleeves or keep her hands together when she was anxious. He could make some guesses based on what he knew of her mother, but there were some gaps that only experience could fill and this was just the start of that. He was glad to be there to support her however she wanted, he just wish he knew what that looked like and could take some preemptive steps to comfort her. Relying on his skills of human observation would have to do and suddenly that didn't feel like nearly enough.

Killian and Ema parted at the hospital and Killian didn't argue. He gave her whatever affection she wanted, met her where she was at, and let her go. That was, he knew, the most he would ever be able to offer the kneazle. Making his way into the next room, he found John Skies sitting. He wasn't quite waiting, but it almost looked like it. Killian understood; he'd spent time in hospitals too many times, knowing there was nothing he could do but wait, except you weren't ever really sure what you were waiting for. Waiting for time to pass. Waiting for something to happen. Waiting for hospital coffee to feel like something. It never did.

Killian nodded though and took a cup for himself, his own hot and steaming and full, which set it apart from John's when he set it down. Hospital coffee tasted like Lorcan maybe never getting better and swallowing the bitterness that was knowing that Lorcan wasn't going to get better, even if he healed. But they weren't here for Lorcan and this wasn't about Killian, so he took a seat.

Hospitals were always that weird temperature where a T-shirt and shorts would be comfortable, or a sweater and jeans would be. It was like there was no temperature but body temperature in here. Killian had left in a hurry at Selina's summons and was in what he'd worn to work for the day, a button up and vest with nice trousers, and he felt ridiculously out of place among the sterile walls and drooping light.

He nodded, agreeing that he'd brought Ema, and then again that she was alright. "Yes," he said, not wanting to give the impression that he was suddenly incapable of speech somehow, although he suspected John wouldn't mind if he was just quiet too. It was odd because the last time he'd seen John, the man had just been Selina's husband, a figure in a system who could help him find Lorcan. And he'd done that. Now, he was his girlfriend's father. He was the same John though, and Killian appreciated that.

Not sure how much Selina had told outside sources about the mist that had been plaguing Sonora, Killian was hesitant to bring up some of the oddities about work. Besides, that was hardly within the scope of his own job and his own job made much better fodder for small talk. "I'm alright," he agreed. "Work is good. Everyone wants to see their guidance counselor when tests and graduation is coming up, so I've been busy. You looking for an intern by chance?" he asked with a light smile, letting John guide the level of humor that was appropriate for the situation.

22 Killian Row I'll take it. 1450 0 5

John Skies

January 20, 2021 6:27 AM

Cheers then by John Skies

He’d asked Killian to talk about work, and he did. Couldn’t say fairer than that. He found a question being turned on him, and he shook his head, not returning Killian’s smile. An intern. A kid, eager to get out into the world, asking when they got to chase down the bad guys, wanting to get to the dangerous parts. He wouldn’t have the patience. He barely did with his junior colleagues who still thought like that. And the idea of someone with him all day… It would be very different to the last time it’d been like that. They were talking about a junior, not an equal. It had been decades anyway… But that was the thing about grief. It distorted reality. Everything looked like the thing you were missing, all roads led back to setting your nerves jangling, thinking about the thing you didn’t want to think about.

“Can ask around though. If you need it,” he muttered in response to Killian’s question. He wasn’t sure how seriously either of them meant either of those things, but it was something to say. That was the bar at the moment. Getting between sentences.

So. That was work.

He took a slow mouthful of coffee, taking time to let the grainy texture really soak in and coat the inside of his mouth, whilst he looked for something else to say.

“How are you at crosswords?” he asked, “Not the cryptic,” he added, “I’m saving those.” He turned the paper to the puzzles section, folding it back. The page behind peeped through the square where the cryptic had been cut out. It was strange, how such a solid show of faith could be contained in the absence of an item. But there it was(n’t).

“Just the regular,” he invited, nodding at it. It was just one paper, between them, the spare was tucked in his bag. It was to be done together, not against. And instead of the goal to be the fastest, he would happily let this simple puzzle expand if it could to fill all the time in the universe. All those things made it different enough, even if the little grid of black and white squares still pulled and clawed at some fundamental piece of him. “So used to thinking in knots, I can’t get my brain to go straight sometimes,” he added, surveying the direct, synonym-based clues which weren’t trying to trip him up or make him unravel layer upon layer of meaning.

He worked steadily through, taking Killian’s suggestions where he had them, skipping over clues where there were too many damn options. That was the trouble with these – there were a million words for ‘easy’– with a cryptic, at least when you got it, you knew you’d got it. Here, you waited to see if you couldn’t intersect it with anything else. Still, it passed the time.

“Hm, here’s one you should get,” he tapped eleven down with the end of his quill. “Showing proper courtesy. Ten letters. _ _ S _ E _ T _ _ _. Been used to describe you,” he added.

13 John Skies Cheers then 0 John Skies 0 5

Killian Row

January 22, 2021 9:12 PM

Bottoms up. by Killian Row

Killian shook his head too, letting his smile fade without becoming unfriendly. This was a hard dynamic to walk into and he was grateful that everyone was genuinely kind. He wondered if this is what Ema had felt like walking into the situation at his home knowing Lorcan wasn't there, although it was different of course; no one really wanted Lorcan there, and the grief at his absence was much less tangible.

A flashback to when he'd visited Selina's home the first time he'd met John came to mind when the man said he was saving the cryptics, and his heart went out to him; obviously, Leo was someone who meant a great deal to him. Killian's throat felt thick and he had the distinct urge to run away, putting the hospital as far behind himself as he could. He had thought he was over that feeling, but his dislike of hospitals was coming back now that he was actually in one and it was hard to push aside the thoughts and memories that came with it. He'd been so young before . . . but no, that was a different time.

He leaned forward, hiding a settling inhale in the natural change in breathing that came with the effort of moving that way, and did his best to help. He wasn't sure whether it would be more helpful not to help and to let John's mind work at it himself, but he found that he was wanting for both company and distraction himself, and the puzzle was challenging enough to offer that when they worked it together.

It felt like he was walking into a trap when he was made to venture on a description of himself, and the additional clue served only to make it harder than it might've been otherwise. The first word that came to mind was 'respectful', as it fit the clue but . . . well, who would have called him respectful? He supposed Ema might have if she'd talked about him respecting her boundaries, but he doubted that was a conversation she'd had with her father. At least, he sort of hoped it wasn't. He also supposed Selina might have described him that way as an employee, as a friend, or as a younger colleague, but it still felt bigheaded to assume that. Still, it wasn't as if there were a lot of other options and Killian aimed for respectful, even if he was pretty sure it wasn't always true.

"Respectful?" he finally ventured, his voice coming out much softer than usual. He hadn't been described as respectful the last two significant times he'd been in a hospital. Far from it. In fact, he'd been called things like 'monster', 'cretin', 'immature', and 'irresponsible'. He'd tried then, though. He'd always tried to be respectful. Perhaps that's why it seemed like the only safe way to even acknowledge that he ever might have been was in a whisper, where the figures in his memories couldn't quite haunt him.

22 Killian Row Bottoms up. 1450 0 5

John Skies

January 22, 2021 10:24 PM

And digging deeper by John Skies

Time was passing. Probably not as much of it as John would have liked, but calling out words which needed synonyms, some of which came easily, and some of which evaded them, was greasing the wheels enough to make it creak slowly on. It kept his brain cells busy enough too without demanding that he generated a subject for them to think about, and for that he was grateful.

He watched Killian carefully after delivering the clue, finding that it took him a long time to land on the word. John wasn’t sure whether it was fear of misstepping or something else - whether the lack of confidence was in his crossword ability or himself, or in just not wanting to risk a mistake in front of someone who it would be awkward to have think badly of him. There were legitimate enough reasons enough in there for a pause, and for a hesitant response, although John wasn’t going to give Killian the easy get out of handing any of those to him on a platter. Closed questions led to closed information.

“Mmhmm,” he confirmed, filling it in. “You didn’t sound too certain,” he observed, regarding him steadily enough that Killian could probably understand that his response should not be limited to the crossword unless that genuinely was the only doubt that had passed through his mind.

13 John Skies And digging deeper 0 John Skies 0 5

Killian Row

January 23, 2021 5:56 PM

It's nice of you to want to. by Killian Row

Killian nodded at John's . . . well, it technically wasn't an inquiry but functionally it was. It was nice to be asked after; his own father wouldn't have done that for his own self-preservation as much as a matter of course, and he was usually the one doing the asking after at work and in other settings. Ema asked after him of course, but it was nice when it was someone who didn't have to care and they were choosing too anyway. In the grand scheme of things, Ema didn't have to care either, but it was different; you'd not be a very good significant other if you never asked after the other person(s).

"Didn't want to walk into it calling myself 'respectful' and then have it turn out it was a different word entirely," he offered with a light smile, but his tone was unconvinced, almost like he was questioning whether John would accept that answer. He suspected the man would on the outside, but also that it wouldn't be a satisfying one and they'd both know it wasn't the whole one. For the sake of good relations with his girlfriend's father, he supposed honesty - at least a little - was more important than avoiding his feelings for a moment.

"I try to be respectful, but people usually describe me as playful or cocky or something I think," he began, his eyes turning to his hands clasped between his legs for a moment before unfocusing altogether. A tile floor with the same pattern, thousands of miles away came to mind, and he'd stared between his legs then too, hoping to find answers in the scattered grey specks that marked it as a 'design'. It had always been the same hospital and this one wasn't, but they were all a bit the same and if he let himself breathe too deeply, the scent of sterility, far from no scent at all, brought it all back. "The last time I was in a hospital, I accidentally set a load of the nurse's papers on fire. It wasn't a good time and I wasn't myself," he added, focusing again on the man before him, wondering if he'd ask. "She called me a lot of things other than 'respectful', and that's on my mind a bit being here."

22 Killian Row It's nice of you to want to. 1450 0 5

John Skies

January 23, 2021 8:39 PM

It's not exactly for your sake by John Skies

Killian initially just seemed like he was wary of blowing his own trumpet, or at least of making a fool of himself. It was an interesting contrast with the words he said were used to describe him most. Neither of them were qualities he thought Ema found particularly attractive in a person, at least not where there was nothing of real substance to back it up. Killian definitely didn't seem playful or cocky staring at the hospital floor, though equally it wasn't hard to imagine it on him.

"Hmm," he nodded. The trouble with being a man was that you knew exactly what men could be like. Whether it was from your own personal sins, or the myriad things you'd seen or heard. Things you maybe should have said or done more about than you did. And then one day, someone came along and placed a baby girl in your arms, and the world looked like a very different place. He could remember a teenage Ema crusading against him that it shouldn't take a personal relationship to one to realise that women were people, and whilst she had a point, there was something to be said for the fact that a child did change your whole outlook on the world. They were much the same, he suspected, when they small and squishy and you just had to make sure they didn't get broken. He couldn't speak from experience, but he suspected infant boys were much the same as infant girls. As they grew though... If you had a boy, you just had to worry about shaping him into a decent human. If you had a girl, you had to worry how everyone else was handling that. And teach her to hex the bad ones and send them packing, and to come get you if they didn't listen. "Well," he summarised, "I don't think my daughter's an idiot, so I'm guessing most people got you wrong."

The story Killian provided of his own disrespectful and disgraceful behaviour was scarcely one to move John's opinion.

"Hospitals have a way of bringing out the best in people," he muttered, his focus coming back more acutely to where he was. "Not saying people ought to be allowed to rant and rail, but there's a difference between that and getting stressed." He looked at the figure in front of him, knowing there was never anything to say that made hospitals, or the memories of them, any less unpleasant. "I don't think Ema would expect you to put a twisting jinx on your own stomach for her sake. If you want to get back to work, I can wait it out with her."

13 John Skies It's not exactly for your sake 0 John Skies 0 5

Killian Row

January 23, 2021 8:52 PM

I'm glad we agree on who is most important. by Killian Row

Killian gave way to another small smile. "I don't think she's an idiot either," he agreed, finding the sentiment oddly reassuring. There had been a time when he would've railed against himself for clearly having fooled her, but he was quite sure that he could not have fooled Ema if he wanted to. She was bright and sharp and very aware of who Killian was, even if she didn't know all the details of why just yet.

Yet.

Was he thinking of changing that? Did he want her to know all those details? It was hard to say for sure. The easy answer was no of course because why would he want her to know all of that? At the same time, he knew very well that if their positions were reversed, he'd want to know. The least he could do was return the favor, although the how and when was a different matter. And the extent of what.

"I would have done about anything to have someone there for my dad when my brother was . . . sick," he said when the offer to leave was put on the table. "Or to have someone there for me, for that matter. I know it's different," he added with a gesture through the door where Leo and Selina and Ema - a great number of the people John loved if Killian could judge - were together, suffering. "I don't mind a twisting jinx for her sake. Or your sake," he added, not sure whether John would say he necessarily wanted Killian there. "I don't think anyone loves hospitals, and I'm not the only one feeling twisted up."

22 Killian Row I'm glad we agree on who is most important. 1450 0 5

John Skies

January 24, 2021 6:14 AM

And on who's the boss of her by John Skies

"Sounds like a good start," John nodded, a friendly enough smile on his face that Killian could take it as a joke if he wanted, that they were both damning Ema with faint praise. Of course, he was glad to hear it, but the crossword in front of them had already suggested that Killian had cleared more than the lowest possible bar long since.

And beyond that, Killian carried on saying the right kinds of things. It hadn’t been a trap. John would not have judged him if he’d gone. He liked what he was hearing though. And, given that Killian’s backside was remaining planted firmly on an uncomfortable chair, in a place he didn't want to be, it was fair to say it wasn't just lip-service. John's eyes followed Killian's gesture. It was all it took. Just one tiny word to represent the entirety of everything that was John's situation not Killian's, and which was only being held back by a set of cafeteria doors. He was glad they were both staring at the doors because he wasn't totally convinced that, in this spotlessly clean hospital, a darn speck of dirt hadn't somehow worked its way into his eye. That Leo was out there, but also that Killian regarded himself as here for John… It was enough to make a place downright dusty.

"Probably right there," he acknowledged shakiky, as Killian said no one wanted to be there. "Coffee's damn awful," he added with far more feeling than even this level of coffee really warranted. He took a final swallow from his cup which allowed him to both grimace, and slam the empty vessel back on the table rather forcefully. "You’re a welcome distraction," he acknowledged, his voice having steadied with a firm swallow. He knew it was probably hard for Killian to tell whether he was helping or intruding, and figured it was only polite to let him know.

He fiddled with the quill for a moment, debating a return to the crossword. He would have thought it the polite thing to do to leave Killian's recollections where they lay. He still did. The words had automatically had him trying to put himself in Killian's father's shoes. He had always worried more about bad things happening to his girls than them becoming bad people. He couldn't imagine what it was like to watch your child destroy themself, become someone you couldn't be the least bit proud of. He did not express pity for Mr. Row out loud because he didn't like it when people pitied Leo. It wasn't dignified. And he would have been inclined to just leave it, for Killian's sake but...

"Sorry to scratch at old wounds but while they're open anyway..." he ventured, acknowledging that this might not be pleasant, but he personally liked to take bad medicine in one swallow. “How much does Ema know about all that? Not that I plan on having a big discussion with her,” he assured him hastily, “Just don’t think I’ve ever known something so personal about someone she’s dating before,” he added. Or been in the position that a former client or case was suddenly dating his daughter, but he didn’t want to say that because he could never decide what word to use that didn’t make Killian sound like a file in an office. That was a way John could not regard him any more, all the while having his head uncontrollably full of the things he knew - things which had been told to him in professional confidence, and which should have stayed in that neat little box but which he knew had a habit of not staying put. He’d had a bit of juggling practise with Killian being Selina’s colleague, but it was intensified now. “It’s funny, the tiny little ways it can come up. Wouldn’t want to say the wrong thing or put you on the spot.” He figured she knew at least as much as he did - she had, after all, been in a house with the niece, whose presence would take some explaining. But it was better safe than sorry.

13 John Skies And on who's the boss of her 0 John Skies 0 5

Killian Row

January 25, 2021 9:46 AM

It's all Ema. by Killian Row

Killian took a breath as they looked on at the doors that didn't really hold anything back but that tried regardless. It seemed the two men had a lot in common with those doors.

"It really is bloody awful," he agreed, glancing into his own cup of coffee before taking another drink. It had nearly the same sort of effect as a strong shot, where you felt awake and grossed out and sort of wanted to make that hissy sound with your teeth except that if you did, it would just make it all taste stronger. Somehow, that was what you wanted anyway. Killian settled for a watery-eyed blink - he doubted he'd ever get used to black coffee like this - and nodded his appreciation for the reassurance.

John seemed to be contemplating for a moment and Killian somehow doubted it was the next clue in the crossword that was on his mind. He found that he was right, for better and for worse, when the man let his curiosity form words.

"How much does she know about Lorcan?" he confirmed, feeling the need to clarify that that was all that was on the table. "The whole of it," he decided after a moment's thought. "I found him this summer - your contacts found him this summer, thank you by the way - and we talked. Ema was a huge support when I told her about it." Not entirely sure what the timeline was for their relationship in the minds of her parents, Killian left the details on that vague. "And the holidays of course. I think my niece took a liking to Ema, although she'd never so. It was nice to see," he said, smiling a little despite himself at the fondness of the memory. Part of what John had said though stuck out to Killian and he cocked his head. "Does it bother you to know what you know about me and my family, now that I'm dating Ema?" he asked, before taking another terrible sip.

22 Killian Row It's all Ema. 1450 0 5

John and Ema Skies

January 25, 2021 8:42 PM

Speaking of... by John and Ema Skies

Lorcan had been found in the summer and Ema had been supportive, hm? There was nothing in Killian’s narrative to confirm or deny how closely those two events had fallen, but the remarks did not go unnoticed. He waved off the thanks for his part in it, deciding not to dig into what Killian had found. That had never been part of the arrangement.

“Do I mind the knowing or the content?” he checked, when Killian returned with a question of his own. Though whatever the original intention of the question had been, he suspected he was now required to answer both. “Knowing seems more useful that not,” he answered. It made things a little awkward, peering into the personal bits of each other’s lives like this, but so long as they didn’t try to cross any lines about that, he thought it was better to know. If Lorcan started stirring up trouble, at least John and Selina were already involved to some degree. It would make for less of a barrier to cross if help was needed. “And I don’t take it as a poor reflection on any of the rest of you – quite the opposite. Whatever your problems, Ema gets a share of them now, so naturally I wish you didn’t have any. But I’ve been around long enough to know that’s not a very realistic wish,” he admitted. Of course, some family dramas were worse than others, and Killian’s did seem to be more substantial than most. Lorcan didn’t sound like anyone he wanted within half a mile of Ema, but he suspected Killian was on the same page as him about that. So long as Lorcan wasn’t dragging Killian down with him, he didn’t feel like John’s problem.

“Thirteen down then?” he stated, once that topic seemed to have been laid to rest, and the pause stretched long enough to need filling with something. They returned to working companionably through the puzzle until the soft swish of the cafeteria door caused John’s head to snap up. He saw Ema glance slightly anxiously between them, though she did her best to stifle the expression as she made her way over.

“The nurses said I might find you here,” she stated, and then seeing the mixed hope and fear spring into her father’s eyes she added, “No change – sorry. I just meant I thought I should come and find you.” You, plural. Seeing as she was very aware she had sent Killian up to wait there, and that he might be wanting a rescue. Still, she’d gone towards her father first.

He stood a little awkwardly. He wasn’t sure if it was fanciful to think that his leg always played up when Leo was bad. It was possible, their injuries had come from the same blast after all. But it equally could have been stress, or sitting too long on cramped hospital chairs. He wrapped Ema in a hug, trying to block out for a second that someone else was there because he wasn’t sure he could hug Ema without emotion. He was big, and supposed to be strong and sturdy, but he when he wrapped his arms around her and bent his head to kiss the top of hers, it gave the impression of something collapsing inwards and being held up. He tried to keep his voice quiet, but the room was still and its low tones easily carried however softly he spoke.

“Good to see you, baby girl.”

And then, after a handful of pleasantries, he disentangled himself from his daughter, and from the moment, from the company gathered in the café.

“I should stretch my legs. Been sitting too long,” he offered. He wouldn’t listen to any protests that he didn’t have to leave, that she wanted to see him and so on – just assured her that she could in a while, that he’d be back, but that he really did need to walk around a bit.

“Good talking with you,” he nodded at Killian, picking up his cane.

Ema busied herself with getting a drink that she didn’t want, so that she and Killian didn’t have to sit in awkward silence pretending they weren’t waiting for her father’s back to finish retreating. When she returned to the table, popping the lid off a soda bottle with her wand, the door had already swished closed.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t realise he’d be up here,” she said, surveying Killian and looking worried. Her father’s parting words had surprised her, but she still didn’t quite dare to believe that she’d get a favourable answer to her next question. “Was it awkward as all heck?”

13 John and Ema Skies Speaking of... 0 John and Ema Skies 0 5

Killian Row

January 30, 2021 10:29 PM

Hello, love. by Killian Row

Killian nodded, satisfied with John's response. It was, given the circumstances, the best he could hope for: to not be judged as alike, to not be looked down upon, and to not be kicked out. Besides, John offered more than that, as he truly seemed to at least be interested in a vague semblance of support for Killian personally, if for their shared interest in the man's daughter. Killian couldn't blame him for that and he wouldn't have even if he could; daughters were important. He smiled, nodding again with a bit more decisiveness when his attention was redirected back to the crossword puzzle.

He looked up at John first when the door opened, the man's immediate reaction being important to Killian, who basically made a living on reading people, and then he turned to see Ema entering the room. He only barely resisted the urge to leap from his seat and embrace her and was glad he'd done so when John was able to get there first. Instead, Killian only stood, rubbing his hands together and then on his trousers as he stretched his back and politely didn't watch the father and daughter reunite. Truthfully, it wasn't the reunion that would have been painful or awkward to watch, but all of the pain and hurt that went into the circumstances surrounding it; Killian didn't need to interfere with that and his presence already did so, he was sure.

When John and Ema separated, Killian turned to face the pair. He nodded as John took his leave, understanding his need to get away and also, perhaps, his desire to leave his daughter and her boyfriend in peace. "Good talking with you too," Killian replied, smiling with his eyes more than anything at what he was pretty sure was a hell of a compliment from a man like John.

When Ema finished distracting herself and returned with a soda, Killian's mouth popped open. "Merlin, where'd you get that?" he asked, bobbing his head around to find that he'd entirely missed most of the available drinks in his haste to do what he was told to and get some terrible coffee. He leaned forward to kiss the top of Ema's head, then jumped over the table, eager to get something that didn't taste like someone got the top soil and coffee grounds mixed up. Grabbing his own soda, he returned to the seat he'd been occupying, now sitting opposite Ema, and took a grateful drink. "That's basically poison, don't drink it," he said, pointing to his cup of mostly untouched coffee. "I literally don't think it's even a food product."

Ema, for her part, looked worried and kindly and loving. "It wasn't awkward, love," he smiled, hoping to dispel at least some of her concerns, knowing full well he couldn't do much about the others that were undoubtedly plaguing her. "I like crossword puzzles and he's a good conversationalist. And we both care about you, so we've got good incentive to get along. Was it awkward as heck talking to my parents?" he added, raising an eyebrow that dared her to say yes as he smirked into the next grateful gulp of fizzy goodness.

22 Killian Row Hello, love. 1450 0 5

Ema Skies

January 31, 2021 7:05 AM

Hey, best human by Ema Skies

Ema pulled the coffee cup over, sniffing its contents with morbid curiosity but abiding by the warning not to drink the stuff. It did smell a little like someone had melted down some tarmac.

"He did a crossword with you?" she asked, a slight sense of disbelief in her voice, or if not that then at least a solid dose of Capital-S-Significance.

"He is," she added, still sounding wary when Killian called her father a good conversationalist. "Usually," she added, because whilst she believed Killian and her father had been getting along - had, after all, seen the evidence with her own eyes and heard it with her own ears - she still felt a long way from believing anything had been comfortable about the situation. Not that Killian had said it had been actively that, just that it hadn't been bad. That her dad was... was it paraphrasing to say 'easy to get on with?' He certainly didn't seem to feel like he had been fed to a hippogriff though, and that was a little unusual, even if she thought her dad was soft as butter. She had reliably been informed by her sister over the years that this was because she was the baby, and daddy's girl, and he would let her get away with anything. She didn't think that was true. She just thought she and he were more of the same wand core (figuratively if not literally) whilst Krissy was much more like mom. People usually took a while to see through the tough old auror exterior though.

"No. Not a lot," she acknowleded reaching her hands across the table to twine them playfully into his, when he asked about feeling awkward with his parents. Her latter remark was accompanied by a slight smile that he could take to mean she was joking, or at least that it had been no more awkward than any other interaction where you were a guest to people you didn't know well and had to mind your manners. "But it's not exactly the same. This is..." she gestured around her at the soulless white walls and emotionless coffee before returning her hand to Killian's. If anyone had set out to paint a picture that formed as stark a contrast as possible with the cosy little cottage in Ireland where every cup of tea was made with love, she thought they would come pretty close to the current reality.

She stood up, coming to sit on Killian's side of the table so that she could lean into him. At least, as much as was possible whilst sitting on awkward seats, which were fixed in place on their crossbars, like the world's most depressing picnic table.

"You're a good human," she murmured, resting her head on his shoulder, taking deep steadying breaths of the fact that he was real and there and hers. She stayed for as long as the awkward neck angle would allow.

"Um, hey?" she asked, as she straightened up, "Did you get my last letter yet? The reply to your reply?"

13 Ema Skies Hey, best human 0 Ema Skies 0 5

Killian Row

February 04, 2021 1:34 PM

That's who you are. by Killian Row

"Not the cryptics," Killian clarified quickly, remembering how important that had been to John. "Just the regular crosswords."

He laughed at the qualifier she used to describe her dad's conversation skills. "Well, when he's talking at least," he conceded. "He's certainly not the most talkative person I've ever met. But if I needed people to use a lot of words to say things, I wouldn't be very good at my job," he said with a smile that verged on cocky but wasn't quite obnoxious, because he knew he was good at his job but he also knew there were other people who would be better at it. At the very least, there were people who could offer students more or different than he could. "He cares a lot about you," he added with a softer smile. "So we have that in common."

He accepted Ema's hands and leaned forward to kiss the tops of them, pressing his forehead against them for a moment and breathing in the fact that she was there, present and real in front of him, even despite terrible circumstances. "This is different," he agreed when he'd leaned away again and she gestured around the room. When she relocated to sit beside him, he was tempted to offer his leg as a more comfortable place for her to sit, but had a momentary vision of her father - or mother for that matter - returning to the room and he quickly decided that the uncomfortable chairs were the more comfortable option.

"You're a good human," he countered playfully, grinning at the compliment as he leaned his head down on hers, planting a kiss there too before resting his cheek against her hair. The arm on that side wrapped around her and he wished not for the first time that he could keep out all the rest of the world with just that little movement.

"No," he said of the letter she'd apparently sent, and the letter she apparently - if her hesitation was anything to judge by which it almost always was - had some feelings about. "Not yet. Do you want to give me spoilers?"

22 Killian Row That's who you are. 1450 0 5

Ema Skies

February 04, 2021 7:22 PM

Not feeling it right now by Ema Skies

“Ah,” Ema nodded when Killian clarified which crossword they’d done. “Still, I think that means he likes you,” she added, looking fondly at Killian herself, and slightly smiling at the idea that he was getting along with her dad. The rest of what he said made it sound like her dad had been vaguely grumpy, and Killian had had a fun time analysing him, but the way her dad had said goodbye to her boyfriend confirmed that - however weird, or awkward, or full of repressed emotions their conversation had been - they’d both been okay having it with each other, and that was something. More than something, given the circumstances.

“Thanks,” she said, with a sincerity and seriousness that didn’t match Killian’s playful tone when he told her she was good. “I’ve been wondering about that,” she admitted. People were telling her she was good to come back, to see her uncle, to support her family… And she had no idea whether she would have done it, had there not been other factors involved. It was hard not to feel mixed up and complicated and guilty at the fact that it was undeniably nice to be sitting by Killian’s side again. She felt bad for feeling so pleased to see him, as if it confirmed that she had come back more for that instead of for her uncle. But then, to see him sitting here, taking her crappy family situation on his already overloaded shoulders, looking after her dad… Who could not be pleased to see him? It felt ungrateful to want to only be sad about everything, when he was such a sparkling silver lining. “I keep wondering whether I came back for the right reasons,” she summarised, sliding her hand back into his and giving it a squeeze in case he didn’t know what she meant by that.

His arm had felt so nice around her, like a perfect little barrier shutting out the rest of the world. As they talked about the letter, she almost wished she’d stayed in there, so she could just mutter into his shoulder.

“No,” she stated, when he asked if she wanted to give spoilers. A fraction of hesitation flickered across her face, but a glance away from him and around the stark white walls of the canteen pushed it back down. She found herself unsure what to do with her face, because trying not to have any emotion visible was, in itself, pretty telling. And as Killian had said, he was pretty good at reading people. She took the coward’s way out, or hoped he would let her, trying to snuggle back into his shoulder so he couldn’t scrutinise her. “But… can you do me a favour? When it arrives, can you bring it over and open it with me? It shouldn’t be more than a day or so…”

13 Ema Skies Not feeling it right now 0 Ema Skies 0 5

Killian Row

February 06, 2021 8:40 PM

That's what I'm here for. by Killian Row

Killian smiled softly, happy that Ema's dad maybe seemed like he liked him. It was a bit weird to be in a relationship with someone when he'd met both their parents before them, but it maybe had benefits too; it was nice knowing he'd had the chance to make an impression as a human and then as a boyfriend.

He shifted his demeanor some as Ema opened up. "You came back to be there to support people you care about," he said, choosing his words carefully so as not to lump himself too firmly in with family members she loved. "And to be surrounded by people who matter to you. I think that's a very good reason."

It wasn't exactly that Ema was hard to read but that reading Ema was hard. Something about his own brain went fuzzy and he started thinking in circles when he tried. There was also an element of care because he didn't want to treat Ema like she was a project or something; she was more than that and he wasn't sure how much she wanted to hear just how much more. He wasn't even sure he knew exactly. Between the two of them, he was sure that he was the messy one and he worried about that more often than he'd like to admit. As if the constant scruff wasn't already a sign of the disarray within. In this particular moment, as Ema snuggled back into him and seemed to almost be taking refuge against his shoulder - both from the world and from his own gaze if he was reading that much correctly - he wanted nothing more than to give her the world in a box.

"Yes, I can do that, love," he said, pressing a longer, slower kiss against her hair this time and pulling her a little more tightly against him as if he might be able to hold all her pieces together if she wanted him to. Merlin knew he would try it if it would help. "Anything for you," he added sincerely, resting his cheek on her head again.

22 Killian Row That's what I'm here for. 1450 0 5