It was nearing ten pm, zero hour for beyond common room adventures. It also ordinarily signaled a clearing out of the common room, something that Laurie was rather depending on this night. It was a Tuesday night, a school night, and normally, she would have been settled in her bed, proofreading an assigned essay or finishing the latest Case File Mystery from Carolyn Keene. Instead, she was crouched near the stairwell, her jeans exchanged for pair of green striped flannel pajama pants. She waited until the common room had emptied, the chairs and sofas surrendered. The fire dimmed in the hearth, as it always did when the large room was void of its typical numbers.
She crept out from her half-kneel by the stairs and parked herself in the sofa closest to the hearth. She drew close the blanket she had received last year for her birthday and shivered into its warmth. Her hair was wrapped tightly in its nightly french braid, the coil twisting down past her shoulders and coming to rest above her heart. Her oval face, ordinarily animated with undue enthusiasm or wrinkled in consideration, was tempered by a different mindframe this night; her lips pursed in thought, and her light brown eyes stared unfocused.
She had decided, early that morning, that it was about time she give in and have herself a good brood.
Oh, it wasn't to say that she had anything particularly brood-worthy to indulge in. Sure, there was the WAIL drama incited by Cecily and carried over by Renaye and Alexis. There was the upcoming newspaper deadline- and at least two different class projects that needed more time devoted to them. There was this business with Alexis: not knowing whether her roommate was geniune in her overtures for friendship, or if there was something maleficent behind them. The lack of communication between herself and Talen Dupree; the continued strife in her dorm room- the list just went on and on. But beyond all that was something else, something that had been nagging at her, tickling in the back of her mind- something that she had been passively avoiding.
Even now, in her hour of self-indulgent brooding, she refused to face that particular something of significance.
Oh, it wasn't to say that this particular something was particularly brood-worthy or anything. At least, not when compared to the litany of aforementioned ones. This particular something was of a more mundane fare. It was of the sit-down-and-sigh-over-and-over-again-just-because-I'm-a-girl-who's-avoiding-dealing-with-an-increasingly-obvious-change-in-affection sort of fare. This particular something, in fact, had a name that it was more properly known by, a rather nice name by most- a name that began with a very innocuous letter and followed with several more equally as innocuous letters.
But Laurie was not about to give voice to that name or its letters.
Instead, she sighed, shivered again, and failed to notice the landing of another body beside hers. Brooding, it seemed, had an adverse affect on her powers of observation.
Josh normally had no trouble sleeping. There were only two in the second-year boys' dorm, so it wasn't as if there were distractions. For some reason though, he just couldn't keep his eyes closed. Maybe it was the after-practice doze he had taken that had cost him a good night's rest, but he doubted it. Sleep was something he could do easily. Silence. Josh knew the value of the saying "Silence is Golden" far too well. He rolled over for what seemed like the hundreth time that night, getting to the point where the lack of sleep was getting annoying. Finally, realizing the desired REM's were not a currently achievable goal, Josh rolled out of bed. He couldn't really place whatever it was that was bothering him. He didn;t even know if anything was bothering him. It was just one of those nights were he just couldn't sleep. Maybe he could go finish that essay... His pale blue eyes drifted over to his table for the parchment only to find last month's Magpies Monthly. Josh let out a sigh. He had left in in the Common Room.
Making sure to be quite so not to wake Zane, Josh made his way to the stairs. He almost tripped on his too-long navy pajama pants at the bottom of the stairs but caught himself before falling. He straightened up and looked around, almost jumping at the sight of another figure in front of the fire. Laurie? Josh retrieved his abandoned essay from the table usually reserved for schoolwork before falling into the spot beside her. She looked very distracted and didn't even react when he sat down. What was she doing up?
"Couldn't sleep either?" He asked, waving a hand in front of her face. "What's on your mind? You looked spaced out."
There was a lot of stuff going on it seemed. Too much for second year than he would have liked. The compilation of the little dramas could add up to equal War and Peace (minus the peace). Worrying about Quidditch was a constant obsession. It would be a lot nicer if everything just chilled. Even Mom and Dad were throwing in their two cents with a possible trip to Norway. What was in Norway, really? Well, it didn't matter because they weren't going. He had friends and family he much rather spend time with.
A hand and then a voice cued her into the presence joining hers by the fire. "What's on your mind? You look spaced out."
Her gasp caught itself half way out of her mouth and transformed into a breathy exhalation accented by two blinking eyes. Josh, of course it would just have to be Josh. Out of all the potential bodies to suffer from sleeplessness and stumble downstairs, it would have to be the one person she was actively trying not to think about. What was on her mind?
Oh, just this and that.
She chanced a quick glance beneath her lashes: his dark hair was endearingly disheveled, and despite having spent a summer seeing him sleep in similar attire, the unintentional intimacy of his clothing forced a dense flush to her cheeks. This was exactly why she had decided to indulge in an hour or two of solitary brooding. She couldn't pinpoint when it started to happen, but at some point, something had changed. Something delicate and fine, some desperately thin line of friendship and- well, the other had been toed too harshly, and with a metaphorical crash, Laurie landed on the other side.
What was on her mind?
Oh, Josh. . .she kept the sigh internalized, and forced herself to take a deep breath. There was really only one thing on her mind of late. Not WAIL, not dorm room drama, not Alexis and potential misdeeds, not the Aronos, or homework. There was only one thing, and he was sitting beside her.
Her best friend, and here she was stuck in the land of the other, about to muck everything up by acting like a typical girl. The blushing needed to stop.
"Eh, not too much. Just the same old things. . ." She forced herself to ignore the clarity of his pale blue eyes and focus instead on the playful edges of the fire's flames. "Just felt like being someplace away from people, you know? How about you? Anything in particular preventing you from your beauty sleep?"
She hoped she sounded like normal; she hoped she sounded like she did during the daylight hours when things felt more defined. When she felt more defined. She hoped. . .and then that flush crept up her throat yet again. The intoned sigh stayed metaphorical.
Josh tried not to laugh as Laurie seemed surprised by his appearance. Tonight seemed like a popular night for sleep to reject people. The craziness of this year had only caused him to lose sleep a few times, but tonight was for no real reason. Maybe it was just luck. Josh looked over to Laurie, setting his partially done essay on the table. Her brown eyes reflected the flames in front of the common room fire, her cheeks were turning a pale pink.
"Eh, not too much. Just the same old things. . Just felt like being someplace away from people, you know? How about you? Anything in particular preventing you from your beauty sleep?"
"Oh, sorry for disturbing your solitude. You can deal for a few minutes, huh?" Josh said with a grin, "Just couldn't sleep. I thought I'd finish my essay, but I got a better reason to procrastinate sleep." Josh looked around the common room, taking in its unusual emptiness. It was different, but weirdly cool. The silence of it was comforting, no shouting, no conflicts, just friends and fire. His gaze returned to Laurie.
"I like the common room like this," he said, leaning back into the couch, "I might have to not sleep more often..." Though he didn't really mean it when he said it, it was a thought that he considered. If this was the only time that he could get some perfect silence, or the affectionate comfort (he wasn't sure if that was Laurie or the peace of it all), then he would sacrifice sleep every night.
"Oh, you're not included with that 'people' list," Laurie immediately reassured, albeit somewhat belatedly. "By people, I mean. . ." Her hand raised to gesture to the air, as if that particular void explained the general mass of congregated students that abounded during the daylight hours. "Well, not you."
The stammering did little to ground out the flushing in her cheeks. She tried to blame it on the warmth of the fire. She didn't know quite how to label it yet. He was her best friend first and foremost, much like Renaye was or Cecily to a lesser degree. But she didn't feel the same when around Renaye; she didn't feel so. . .aware of everything. She had been lying when she pretended ignorance to when it began. She knew the exact time, down to the very second.
When Josh had angled his head, his blue eyes stark in the basking sunlight of the Gardens, she had suddenly become so very aware of the skin of his arm on her own, of the way his body provided a warmth separate from that of the sun beside her. It was Josh, the exact same Josh from mere second before, but in that instant, when he murmurred those taletell words, he had changed. She had changed.
"I might have to not sleep more often. . ."
And now it seemed like everything he said to her had some double meaning hidden underneath it. No doubt, the product of her over-active imagination. She hated being confused, second-guessing herself. This was Josh- her best friend. Yes, he was a boy. And she was a girl, and there all those things or whatever that might get in between that, but still. This was Joshua Warren. She spent the past summer with him sleeping next to her bunkbed. What was there to get so flustered about?
Her fingers, as were their habit, found the tail end of her braid and began their plucking, the tugs gentle enough to not cause any pain. Her mind, always interested in seeking out organization, especially when in the midst of a mini-crisis of emotional levels, found rest in the patterned movements of first unbraiding, and then re-braiding the elbow length strands of hair. That her body acted without Laurie's conscious will was really only secondary.
She was concentrating on remembering how to talk. Normally. With Josh. Her best friend. Emphasis on the best friend portion in particular. A little wistfully, her words finally found voice. "I was actually kind of thinking that it's too bad things change. And how that change just up and happens without your permission. It just. . ." Her lips frowned plaintively. "It just leaves me feeling unsure of things, of myself."
OOC- PS: I know you're off traveling and having summer fun, so I won't expect you to reply straight away. Have fun on your trip!
Josh smiled to himself, staring into the fire. He didn't mind being the exception to the solitude preference. Sometimes Josh missed being able to just go outside and lay by the pond. Just a few moment of silence. Sometimes Raye would hear him get up and join him outside, usually giving him a minute. Maybe they would be able to do that over break, he thought. The sleep that had been escaping him was still managing to avoid him. He felt plenty awake, yet strangely relaxed. Laurie seemed to be the smallest bit off, but he supposed that was due to the lack of sleep. Glancing out the window for a moment, Josh's eyes caught sight of the pitch-black night that lay just outside that pane of glass. Night was Josh's favorite time of day. He didn't know what it was about it. The darkened hours that were lit up by stars held this irresistable appeal to him. Everything seemed so much nicer when basked in moonlight, even late-night moments. Sitting in the common room with one of his favorite people in the world somehow wouldn't be the same in the afternoon or morning, not because of the people that were normally around in during the day though. An afternoon empty common room didn't hold the tenderness of the night.
In his glance towards the window, his eyes almost unconciously traveled to Laurie's calm figure, preoccupied with the fiddling of her braid. Why was she so distracted? He could almost see the wheels turning in her head. The glow of the fire made her distracted eyes shine and the pink-tinted complection of her skin itself seemed to glow. His observations were cut short by her spoken words.
"I was actually kind of thinking that it's too bad things change. And how that change just up and happens without your permission. It just. . . It just leaves me feeling unsure of things, of myself." Josh sat up a little straighter, turning so he was facing her. He wasn't sure he completely understood what she was saying, at least not the last bit. Why would change make her unsure of herself?
"Laurie, what..." he began, trying to figure out what he was going to say as he spoke (which wasn't turning out too well), "Is something... I mean, are you sure somethings not bugging you?" Josh had no idea what it would be. He was just voicing concerns. "You just seemed a little distracted."
OOC: Change of plans :) Not taking off until 9 tonight so I had a few hours. Thought I'd post.
Laurie leaned back unconsciously at Josh's increased nearness, her steady blush until then fading back into a startled paleness. Beneath the sun freckles that a summer (and then fall) of dousing in the sun, her skin stretched ashen. She heard her own breath hitch, felt her skin prickling, and then methodically forced herself into full stillness.
"Something's bothering me," she admitted, staying safe in the realm of vagaries. "I don't really know how to explain it. . ." And not cause undue befuddlement, or unnecessary injury to what was a very valuable friendship. A moment of insight dawned. Sort of.
"Okay so," she shifted a bit, drawing her knees up to her chest and resting her chin over them. "Imagine you've had this, um, video game sitting on your shelf for a long time, and you play it every now and again- it's dependably tricky and interesting, but nothing life-changing, and then suddenly, out of no where, you go to play it one day, and it's like the most amazing game you've ever played."
Her hands lifted to punctuate the air, plainly frustrated. "And now, every time you're playing this game, you doubt your normal habits and abilities. Like instead of using the typical short attack combo, you hesitate and end up using up all of your healing items. But you really like the game, so you don't want to stop playing it, but now it's just all complicated, and the game doesn't even realize anything's different at all."
Somehow her metaphor for her current emotional state became overly personified, and next thing she knew, the video game would grow a pair of pale blue eyes and who knew what sort of anthropomorphisms she might delve into next? She paused, feeling more than a little silly, and resolved to save this particular brood for another occasion- perhaps an occasion titled 'never.'
"I think I'm over-reacting." She realized she wanted to share this with someone- obviously it couldn't be Josh, he might misunderstand and think she was turning all 'super girl' on him or something. She might be able to talk to Renaye, but there was always the chance for miscommunication there as well. She wished her mom was there. "I must be. . ."
0LaurieThen I need to bring milk as well.0Laurie05
Coincidentally, I'm eating s'mores at the moment.
by Josh
OOC: So on the last day of the trip, I found the one place in the camping grounds with signal. And we're leaving in a few hours. *sigh* Ah well, better than nothing, right?
BIC:
Josh wasn't quite sure what to say. He didn't know how to respond when Laurie confirmed something was troubling her, but didn't know how to explain it. What else could he say besides something along the line of "I'm sure it'll be fine...?" Laurie seemed to find a way to evaluate though, to Josh's relief. He didn't want to seem completely clueless. And now, apparently, he had a video game... and he liked it enough to play every once in a while (where was this going?)... Josh's mind was trying to keep up with the metaphor, still not quite seeing where this was coming from. He tried his best to imagine the scene she was placing in front of him, though Josh hadn't really played video games... ever. He listened to her story, his expression turning from attentive to confused. Maybe if he changed it around... Flying! Let's say Josh had a broom that he liked to fly occasionally. It was a great broom, but nothing like his Flare. One day he's flying and he has a sort of epiphany... He suddenly liked this broom-- Whoa. It all seemed to click. His mind was jumping back to the Gardens the previous year, Josh teaching Laurie the steps for the dance. He remembered looking down at her and having a sudden realization, much like the one he was imagining with the broom. Josh felt his face warm, his thoughts buzzing to where there was no way he would be able to sleep now. Did she know? Had Renaye said something? No... She knew where the boundaries were. Did Laurie like someone? The mere thought of it caused this odd sinking feeling mixed with the smallest bit of jealousy. Laurie's scenario wasn't quite over yet though.
"And now, every time you're playing this game..." Flying the old broom... "...you doubt your normal habits and abilities. Like instead of using the typical short attack combo, you hesitate and end up using up all of your healing items. Instead of taking after the bludger and going for the attack, he holds back, scared of... oh... Getting hurt. "But you really like the game, so you don't want to stop playing it, but now it's just all complicated, and the game doesn't even realize anything's different at all." Josh loves flying on the old broom and doesn't want to stop using it, but using the broom makes it harder for him to play to his fullest strength making him wonder about the broom. And the broom doesn't know about all these internal conflicts.
"Merlin, I think I get it," he said slowly, his eyes focused on the wall ahead, his understanding shocking him a little. At least, he hoped he had it right. "Let me run this by to make sure: So the broom-- Sorry, that was my way of interpreting it. The video game is like a person. You liked them before, but then there was a point where you liked them," Josh refused to say the words "like-like." As he spoke, he felt the blood rushing to his face. He felt like he was relaying his thoughts through her example. "But when you're around them you're not really sure of yourself. You've got this whole thing going on in your head and they don't even know. You don't want to make things weird so now its all complicated and hard to deal with. You still like being around them, it's just a little different now for you," Josh said, speaking more to himself now. "I mean, you still like to hang around them, but there's always this feeling in the back of your mind that makes you a little more unsure of yourself." Josh blinked, his face feeling especially warm now. He did everything he could to avoid Laurie's gaze. He wasn't going to ask who it was. That might be a little too far and he wasn't sure he even wanted to know. Talen was his guess. He turned quickly to her, hoping to save himself some ebarrassment. "Am I even on the right track?"
"I think I'm over-reacting. I must be. . ." Josh chanced a glance over at her before turning back to the fire.
"If it's a big deal to you then you're not over-reacting."\r\n\r\n
0JoshCoincidentally, I'm eating s'mores at the moment.0Josh05
Then I am jealous, 'cause I lub s'mores.
by Laurie
Laurie felt some of her stored anxiety melt;the way that Josh so easily translated her reach of a metaphor into something comprehensible, made her lips spread into a fond smile. That doubt and self-questioning she had just described, it suddenly felt very silly indeed. What was she getting so worked up about? This was Josh; best friend, better than a brother (especially her brothers, the bullies- well, except for Bryce, he was mostly on about her being short and younger and a girl, none of which she could protest against), and definitely not fodder to be fawning over.
Except. . .
Her light brown eyes flicked to her left; his light blue gaze was fixated elsewhere, and as he spoke- her stomach skipped.
Except. . . for that. He was her best friend, better than a brother, and sometimes caused a stomach fluttering.
Josh went on. "You've got this whole thing going on in your head and they don't even know. You don't want to make things weird so now its all complicated and hard to deal with. You still like being around them, it's just a little different now for you." Her eyes went wide, surprise registering brightly in their expression. Josh really understood, he really got it. . .
"I mean, you still like to hang around them, but there's always this feeling in the back of your mind that makes you a little more unsure of yourself."
She felt her lips part, words willing to leave, but unable. He really did understand. It was almost as if he had felt that way himself, at some point. . .Her eyes opened wider, and her head jerked towards his, the words still wanting to voice themselves. He turned at that same moment, met her gaze, and she knew in that second that Josh understood not through empathy alone, but from personal experience. Josh had someone he liked.
And it wasn't her.
Dejection landed on her shoulders instantly, and more than anything previously, it was the weight of this disappointment that cemented Laurie's mind that this gambit of emotional conflicts and confusing thoughts equated to one thing: she was suffering from her first, real, crush. And from Josh's words and body language, the faint color to his cheeks belying his embarassment, this was an unrequited one. She racked her brain to try and think of who it might be. Maybe Liz Guthrie from Teppenpaw, or even some girl back at his home neighborhood.
Her shoulders slumped, and dimly she realized that Josh had responded to her earlier statement. "I need to just get over it then," she decided aloud with a slight shake of her head. Liking her best friend, especially when it seemed obvious that he liked someone else, well, it could only promise disaster. "Mind over matter, right? Keeping a good friend by being quiet is better than saying something that can't be taken back and messing everything up, right?"
She gazed into the fire, trying desperately to ignore the heavy stone of disappointment that was making a home in her chest. The irony that she was voicing all of these concerns to the very person who inspired them was not lost on her. It made the disappointment all the more bitter. It was part of the reason why her feelings felt so conflicted: Josh was too valuable a person in her life to lose over something like this. She couldn't stand the idea of him feeling uncomfortable around her or avoiding her.
Those words that so wanted to unburden themselves needed to stay trapped and locked in her throat. However, she still asked the question, wondering almost masochistically what his answer would be. "What would you do then? With the girl you like- that is, if there's a girl you like? Would you tell her?"
0LaurieThen I am jealous, 'cause I lub s'mores.0Laurie05
One of the pluses to no web and camping... S'mores :)
by Josh
Judging from Laurie's experssion, Josh hadn't been too far off (thank Merlin). It would have been so mortifying if he had been completely off. Although, there were drawbacks to being right. Being right meant confirming that there was someone on her mind. As embarrassing as it might have been, Josh wouldn't have minded being wrong if it meant that Talen or someone else wasn't occupying her thoughts. He would have hoped that throughout the year something might have changed. But would she really be discussing this with him if was him? Josh's thought process seemed to be throwing doubt after doubt into his mind. He knew he liked Laurie, knowing that was the easy part. The part that threw him off, just like she was talking about, was the transition from friends to the More that was always on his mind.
"Mind over matter, right? Keeping a good friend by being quiet is better than saying something that can't be taken back and messing everything up, right?"
Josh felt his hopes sink at her words, mostly because she was right. As much as he did like her, he was glad to have her as a friend more than he felt the need to say anything. He nodded slowly, wanting to say something. He bit his lip to keep him for an outburst. Sometimes the risk might be worth it... he was thinking. This statement contradicted his actions though. He hadn't been taking any risks. He had sat back and enjoyed the year, letting his thoughts fester in the back of his mind. And now it seemed they were rising quickly to the surface, everything coming at him at once. What could he do that wouldn't throw their friendship into the midst of awkwardness? Not much... There was still a part of him that wanted to just tell her. This whole keeping-his-silence thing was frustrating, and at the moment with all of his feelings so fresh in his mind, Josh just wanted to say something.
For Josh, he was nervous. Josh was nervous about what might happen if he said something... What if he said something and she looked around, her honey colored eyes wide in the way that they did when she was surprised or worried. She was always taking him by surprise, so figuring out what she would say was a little more difficult. He wasn't worried about what she might say, it was that expression he didn't want to see. Then, reliably surprising Laurie asked the question he didn't really have an answer to, "What would you do then? With the girl you like- that is, if there's a girl you like? Would you tell her?"
Josh's eyes widened and his mouth fell slightly open as he jerked to look at her. It was like she had read his thoughts! What a cruely mind-twisting question... He was avoiding finding the answer to that particular question, but now he was forced to face it. Josh ran a hand through his hair as he let out a sigh.
"I have no idea. I've been avoiding that question. I mean, I want to tell her, but it's that thing, that I-don't-know-what-would-happen because we're friends. It kind of freaks me out," Josh said, having trouble stringing sentances together without completely giving himself away. It would be so much easier to just say it. In the late hour, and the infectious opportunity of night, he was finding it harder and harder to keep it to himself. "I mean, we're friends, so saying something is really hard. I guess I would have to say something like... Merlin, I have no idea what I'd say..." Josh let out another sigh, resisting the urge to just blurt it out. His mind was fighting a battle, and secrecy seemed to be losing. "She's... It's so hard to explain. I want to say something, but... It's like your video game- or my broom- whichever. It's great being friends and being around you," Josh's mind froze. What? Josh tried to resist groaning at his mix up. So much for secrecy... "Wait, I meant- I was trying to say- I didn't mean... Geez... Merlin, forget it. Laurie, it's you." Josh's thoughts, so recently buzzing, screeched to a halt. He diverted his eyes to the fire. There. He'd said it. That should answer her question well enough, right? He suddenly felt this insane mix of relief and anxiousness. Now came the part he was afraid of...
0JoshOne of the pluses to no web and camping... S'mores :)0Josh05
So going to home and making s'mores after work.
by Laurie
Laurie regretted the question almost immediately, and yet, she would have still asked it. Worse than knowing, was being left guessing. An imagination could be a cruel thing, and hers was a master at creating the worst scenario. Already, her mind was brewing up universes in which the girl in question was none other than a certain redhead who had managed to enisle herself rather well this past term. She blanched away from the consideration.
"I have no idea. I've been avoiding the question." Well, that answered that, she realized glumly. Josh did like someone- and not only had Laurie not noticed this fact, but it had been for a while. "I mean, I want to tell her-" She bit her lip to stop from interjecting. She wanted to protest, but what could she say? She had been the one to ask the question- to force the issue. And so, she stayed quiet, hating that she pressed the subject at all, hating that she had chosen this night to creep downstairs and curl up by the fire.
If only she had waited one more night. If only she had just avoided thinking about this all together. If only- she paused, mid-thought, and re-focused. Josh was still talking, and it sounded as if he had said. . . She straightened on the couch, pulling herself tighter into the blanket with the movement. Her eyes blinked furiously, as if the quick motions would somehow clear her thoughts from the cobwebs. It had sounded like. . .but- it couldn't be.
But he had. He really had. "Laurie, it's you."
"Oh." Eloquent, her response was not. But that was the sum of her thoughts in that second. Her past few weeks of confusion and quandary had culminated to this one night. Still blinking, her gaze a little dazed, she repeated her thoughts. "Oh"
Dimly, she thought she heard the sounds of midnight chime. "I, well. . ." Her vision gained focus, and slowly, her lips widened into a tentative smile that then spread into a full grin. Forget eloquence and weeks of over-analysis. Forget fretting and feeling flustered. Josh had just said it was her. He liked her. And she. . .well, she-
"My video game- or your broom, that was you," she said in a rush, and then- "I mean, really, it's the same. It's you," she breathed, feeling both warm and light-headed all at once. Distantly, the chime finished sounding. She realized, as an after thought to her confession, that she was officially now thirteen years old. Not a bad start at all.
0LaurieSo going to home and making s'mores after work.0Laurie05
That wasn't so bad. "Oh" was fine with him, so much better than the many scenarios his mind had produced in the brief moment that had past. Nevertheless, Josh still wasn't quite okay with taking his eyes off the dancing flames. He could still see her out of the corner of his eye, but looking her in the eyes was something that took more force that one might think. Laurie's limited speech was a little nerve-racking. It may not have been the longest period of time, but in those moments Josh imagined a variety of thoughts he was sure were going through her mind. Everything from "Way to screw up our friendship. Why didn't you keep your mouth shut?", to "I don't know how to tell you this, but I like Talen", to "Sorry, Josh, but Renaye's my friend and you're her brother". He readied himself for the worst, though he fairly certain Laurie would try to be nice about it. All the same, he couldn't deny that small bit of hope that found a way to dominate the many doubts he had.
To his right, he saw Laurie's rather stunned expression turn- he blinked to make sure he was seeing right- to a small smile. He turned his head just enough so he had a better line of vision, but as he did so her expression continually changed, her smile spreading across her face. For a heartstopping second, he thought she might laugh. A second thought seemed to kick that notion to the side; she seemed happy. Josh's mind seemed to go into a shocked daze. As Laurie spoke, he heard her voice as if far away, as if it wasn't even real. "My video game- or your broom, that was you." She had said it rather quickly, but it wasn't hard to decipher what was spoken. Josh only had two words repeating in his thoughts, 'No way... No way... No... Way...' He finally found the motivation to turn his head and meet her eyes, resisting the urge to wrap his arms around her. At that moment, he felt like he was Luck's favorite guy. That small part of hope he had before seemed to have exploded. "I mean, really, it's the same. It's you." Josh bit the inside of his cheek, trying to keep the outrageous grin from spreading onto his face. The effort, he figured, wasn't worth it, so he didn't bother trying to contain it anymore.
"Oh," he said, trying to keep from laughing with relief.
Josh wasn't too sure what to say next. He didn't think he would mind quiet that much. His vision was focused on the gleaming smile on Laurie's face. Nothing else seemed to be comprehending. Josh's mind was still attempting to wrap around the concept. After- Merlin, how long had it been?- a year of reminding himself "We're friends," she liked him back now. Everything was meshing together, so much where Josh thought he was going to burst. He had managed to claim the spot on the Crotalus Quidditch Team and now he was sitting here, midnight, with Laurie Cider, the girl he had taught to dance in the Gardens, the girl who led them on so many adventures, the girl he had sat with, hidden outside Cascade, with his arm around her as tears slid down her face, the girl who had looked so amazing at the ball he barely remembered what Cecily's dress was (his eyes were elsewhere). It all seemed so long ago...
Josh wanted to say so much. He wanted to tell her about the way Renaye and Irene had been bugging him to say something to her. He wanted to ask what she thought was next. There was so much he wanted to say. With the fear of ruining a friendship pushed to the side, Josh was able to concentrate on other occupying thoughts, like how much he wanted he wanted Laurie to be his. He wanted to be able to reply to questions like "Who's your friend?" with "This is Laurie, she's with me." Asking for permission to say things as such was almost as difficult as speaking up. What the heck? So much had already happened tonight. At the moment he felt invincible. Why not?
The brief sound fell from Josh's mouth, and Laurie couldn't help the small giggle that slipped through. She knew she was blushing, and she knew the moment was bound to be an awkward one. After all, she had, let's see, zilcho experience when it came to trading crush confessions. She had only just realized that the strange pangs she had been suffering from for the past few weeks were from having a crush only recently. Acclimating to that realization had been pushed to the side until this very night.
It felt a bit rushed, but in a completely, rollercoasters-are-so-fun-let's-go-again kind of way. She felt a bit panicky, but in an entirely, here's-the-first-loop-don't-forget-to-raise-your-arms-and-don't-dare-close-your-eyes sort of panic. Maybe a little feverish, perhaps a bit impish, but she knew that behind all of these slightly manic highs, there was one predominant, renascent emotion influencing it all: happiness. And sure, a little girlish bliss as well, but Laurel Cider was a girl after all. She was allowed that.
But what happened now?
Her brain, silly organized thing that it was, had naturally followed itself to a logical conclusion to this current state of affairs. She liked him, and he liked her- that thought alone made her cheeks burn even more. So now that that fact had been cemented, what happened? Did this make them a couple? Did they still refer to each other as friends, or-
"So what's next? You want to give it a try?"
Laurie found herself unable to look him in the eye, feeling unbearably nervous, but in that exhilirating ride-my-bike-with-no-hands sort of way. Hesitantly, she nodded. It felt so bizarre to be so shy around him. They had spent the past year and a half in almost constant company of each other. In class, in the dorm, in the Gardens, the whole summer- what was there to be so shy, so stalled about? But this was something new; this put a brand new spin in their dynamic. Laurie might be lacking in personal experience, but she was practical enough to recognize that being buddies was a different animal to whatever they were now.
To whatever it was she had agreed to giving a try.
Even if she was feeling about three years old and as a shy as a morning glory. Suddenly, she wanted her mom around for an entirely different reason. Forget about venting; now she needed advice from someone experienced! What was supposed to happen now? Because really, despite all of the inner meandering, she still had no answer to that.
From friends to this. . .and then, she knew.
Well, kind of.
Still feeling that bubble of nervous, rushing panic in her stomach, and still keeping her eyes purposely averted, she reached over with her hand until she found his, and gently, she squeezed, hoping that her inner sentiments, her inner excitement at this change, would translate through the gesture. And so, for the first time in her newly thirteen years of life, Laurie Cider held a boy's hand- a boy who she liked, and who liked her back.
0LaurieWotW: I ended up having cereal instead.0Laurie05
The second the words left his mouth Josh felt every ounce of daring leave him. Forget invincible, at the moment he was back to square one, his mind producing disasters and What if's at rapid fire. What had he been thinking? He had barely figured out where she stood and then he had jumped to take the chance. The one thing that was keeping his nerves at bay was the tinge of pink that had been consistent throughout the night. Somehow, the pink in her cheeks tempted a smile to his face. Through the taunting thoughts replicating in his mind, he somehow found a way to keep his vision in her general direction. Thankfully. Because then he wouldn't have seen the incline of her head that made his stomach jump. He couldn't help but let out a short, relieved breath of air.
Now there really was no bringing him down. And he would definitely not be able to sleep tonight. Josh was trying to get over his luck at the moment. It wasn't like he had done this before. The closest link would be Lynnie back at home. He hadn't liked her, but Renaye liked to tease him endlessly about her crush on him. This was a different ballpark, a different ballpark in a completely new state. Didn't turn out so bad, huh? The only thing making his thoughts uneasy was the uncertainty of what she was thinking. Her eyes were turned, blocking what he normally relied on to judge her reactions.
Thankfully, he was saved the trouble. Josh's eyes darted down in slight surprise as he felt the warm touch of her fingers around his. The gentle squeeze somehow held reassurance and opportunity all at once. A small smile came to his lips as he turned his hand in hers, intertwining his fingers with hers.
"I think this has been efficiently..." he paused, searching for the right word, "Roller coaster. I'm not sure if sleep is going to happen for me tonight," he said with a small grin. Man... He could imagine Renaye's face... The girlish squeal might be a little annoying (and maybe a little embarrassing) at first, but at least he wouldn't have her consistent, hinting looks all the time now. Everything seemed like a strange dream, something his imagination might have cooked up. If it wasn't for the all-too-real feeling of Laurie's hand in his he might have believed it was a taunting dream.
0JoshCereal for dinner is one of my favorites0Josh05
I seriously have nine different cereals in my pantry.
by Laurie
She felt the curl of his fingers, blended between hers, and Laurie realized for the first time what a strange sensation it was to have the feel of something foreign sliced between her skin. It was her hand, her fingers, and then his, and result was a lingering, ghostly feeling of right, but then not. It left her wondering if all future touches, things she once did so casually, without concentration or forethought, would too become a new experience.
Her eyes still avoided resting anywhere near his, despite the glaring intimacy of the moment. But then he spoke, and she responded without consideration. It was the roller coaster mention that did it.
"I thought the exact same thing!" she exclaimed, twisting so that she was forced into direct eye contact. The blushing instantly spread, staining her cheeks and throat; the temptation to duck and cover was strong, but purposely, she took a deep breath and made herself keep the gaze.
This was Josh, her. . .well, her something. She took another deep breath. "Um, do you suppose things are going to be, um, different now?"
She supposed it was the surreal feeling of the situation that gave her the pluck to ask the glaringly obvious. She also supposed that the best word to describe her current state of stomach butterflies would be giddy. To punctuate her mood, another giggle escaped from her lips, and nervously, her free hand fluttered up to cover her mouth. But another one broke out, and then a third, until finally, the sounds were bubbling one after the other, and her words barely managed coherence between them.
"I'm just-" giggle! "-kind of-" giggle! "-nervous but-" giggle! "-really, I-" She finally caught herself, and grinned. "I'm glad. I'm just really glad."
And then, just because the mood seemed to invite it, she invited in a non sequitur. "So, two truths and a lie; go."
0LaurieI seriously have nine different cereals in my pantry.0Laurie05
"I thought the exact same thing!" Laurie exclaimed, leaving the previously quiet girl behind. Josh couldn't help but let his small smile turn into a grin as a blush crept into her cheeks as she turned to face him, her eyes meeting his. The night was proving to be very roller coaster, ending at a high point. He had come down to the common room, feeling fairly content. Would he have expected this as he wandered from the dorm down the stairs? Never. In fact, not long ago he sat here on this couch thinking for sure she was asking him how to talk to Talen. If it wasn't for his brain blip, he might not have said anything at all. Thank Merlin for the late hour.
"Um, do you suppose things are going to be, um, different now?"
Josh paused, considering what she was asking. Would it be? It definitely seemed different at the moment, but who was he to guess when every little thing, to him, seemed to carry an electric charge? Josh sent his imagination forward some time, trying to imagine them sitting in the common room. At the picture he saw, he found his answer,
"Not really," he said, "Yeah, of course a little, but I'm sure it'll be just like before, just a little more... honest, I guess." Yeah, that seemed right. As the words left his lips, Josh felt the sense open future overwhelm him. There was so much time where he didn't have to worry about hidding a crush. Now it didn't really matter if she caught him staring. Okay, maybe a little.
As Laurie continued to speak, her bubbly laughs interjecting into her sentence, Josh couldn't help but laugh along with her. But he caught what she was saying, the great spirit-lifting words she was saying. And then she challenged him to a game. Josh loved these games. They had gotten them started at the ball, but Cecily had wanted to dance.
"Okay," he said, thinking back to anything she might not know, "My favorite team is the Montrose Magpies. My favorite place I've been is Sydney, Australia. I'm older than Renaye by two minutes." Okay, so that one wasn't exactly fair. Josh's favorite place he had been was Venice in Italy. It had nothing to do with attending the advertisement briefing with the Italian Quidditch team, of course...Ahem. The younger Josh had been thrilled by the gondola ride and breathed in every bit of the city he could. Sydney, however, was a close second. Mom and Dad had paid for a snorkeling adventure while they went to the drawing board for the future Wildfire. He sent her a grin before relaying the question with,
But hopefully not for future consumption?
by Laurie
Laurie pondered, tongue in cheek, considering the options. The question with this game always was whether it was the lie or the two truths that told you more about the person. She tended to think it was the latter. Now she knew for a fact that the Montrose Magpies were his favorite team; it was impossible to be around him for even a little bit and not have stumbled upon that fact.
"Okay. . .so, it's between Sydney and being older than Renaye." She pursed her lips in consideration and thought aloud. "I always forget this, too, so you would think I would make a point to give it some kind of memory trick, like a song or something. . .but- Renaye is always acting like the older sister, and she does seems more mature." She threw in the last bit, her tone teasing, as it was a long standing joke that girls were naturally more mature than boys. "I really don't know about Australia, though. You guys have been all over."
It was something she envied about the twins' background; because of their parents' business, they were always visiting exotic locations. They knew more about the geography of the world from person experience, than she could ever hope to gain from studying a globe. "Australia seems like the sort of place one might make a favorite location, so I'm going to say that it's the middle one."
Despite her pronouncement, she doubted her choice. Now it was her turn, though. Her mouth quirked, and she gave him a considering glance. She needed to make it tricky, but not too much so. What were things that Josh might not know about her. . .
"And now then, for me. . .I hate pickles, my favorite detective is Sherlock Holmes, and my middle name is Fiona."
Admittedly, Laurie made it a bit more than tricky. In truth, Sherlock Holmes was a big favorite of hers, but her absolute favorite was actually Miss Jane Marple from Agatha Christie fame. She liked how for Miss Marple, there was always a connection between people. The idiosyncrasies of one individual, and then seen in another person, showed proof of some likeness. It made a family out of people with no relation except that once, in their mutually exclusive lives, something happened of similar description.
The only way Josh might know that fact about her would be if he had studied her shelves during the summer. Her bedroom at home had no formal bookcase displaying her collections, but rather a scattering of bookshelves, wherever the wall space allowed it. Out of all her author collections- Doyle, Keene, Campbell, Hope, Warner- her copies of Agatha Christie’s works showed particular wear and tear, in particular, those that starred the wry Miss Marple.
0LaurieBut hopefully not for future consumption?0Laurie05
Josh watched, amused, as Laurie considered the options. She immediately took off the Magpies, a fact he was glad she had made note of, otherwise he would really be concerned about her observation skills. He let out a small noise of indignation at her remarks on Renaye's level of maturity. No doubt though that she did act like the older sister. There were times at home when she would take charge, taking over the mothering shift while Mom took her absence. There was really no way to guess about Australia though, but Laurie took a guess, the right one.
"You got it," he said, sounding a little surprised, "My favorite place is Venice, Italy. When I went there I got to chill with the Italian team while Dad made the advertisement pitch. But apart from that, the rivers where just so cool to me! I was about eight when we went. The gondolas sold it for me. The whole trip was very cool, even if it only lasted a week. I've always wanted to go back."
It was her turn now, and the look she gave him made him sure that it wasn't going to be easy... and it wasn't. Josh let out a groan as she finished her list. Josh may not be a big fan of pickles, but he knew Uncle Mike was one of those that bought jars of them. Yet again, Uncle Mike had some weird tastes. Sherlock Holmes seemed like a good fit for Laurie. He could see her reading mystery novels, a notebook nearby as she tried to solve the mysteries herself. He discarded this. Laurel Fiona Cider... Hmm... Of course, Josh had no idea what he middle name actually was. Renaye's was Sorina and Irene's was Selina (yes, oddly similar). He may have remembered it from a time in Florida. Maybe her mother had used her full name in warning like mothers do.
"Pickles are generally disliked, I believe, so I'll let that one slide," he said, relaying his thought process, "I can see you into a Sherlock Holmes story, writing down the clues to work it out, so that one gets the okay... I think. That leaves your middle name, which I am guessing is not Fiona... Right?" Josh added the question as an afterthought. After all, it was just a guess.
And it was his turn again.
"I broke a window once when I was six while practicing Beater, using rocks for bludgers and had to stay off my broom for a week. If I was girl, my parents would have named me Sorina, but since I wasn't a girl, Renaye got it as her middle name. My first magic was when I was four and I turned Renaye's hair purple because I was mad she took my grape jolly rancher." Josh's first show of magic had actually been in Sweden. The young twins were having a heated debate over which movie they wanted to watch while they spent the night in muggle Sweden. Renaye was begging to watch The Lion King (again), while Josh wanted Toy Story (again). At one point he had sulkily agreed to watch The Lion King (again) just to shut her up, while secretly wishing the movie was lost during the last packing, though he knew it was there (he had packed it). Renaye slipped the tape into the TV, but nothing played. When Josh peeked into the video slot, the movie was gone. Toy Story it was...
Unfortunately, the statement that he would have been named 'Sorina' was true.
OOC: *grins* Notice the use of VHS? Oh, the good old days...
Sorries- impromptu camping trip intervened.
by Laurie
Laurie smiled sheepishly at Josh's response. She had actually intended to say that she thought that Renaye really was the older sibling, and so that one had been the false one. "Um, actually, I flubbed. I thought Australia was one of the two truths. Still though, just learned two new things about you: you are the older sibling, and you have a thing for gondolas and canals."
Unconsciously, she brought her hand back to her lap, bringing her knees to her chest in consideration. "You know, maybe we could do something like that for the fair. . .I know we were thinking about maybe teaching people how to swim, but maybe a journey to Sonora's own Little Italy would be cute."
She pictured broadening the makeshift dam they had made to deepen their swimming spot, fashioning some kind of gondola- the picture was quickly transformed into silliness when her mind conjured up an image of Josh dressed in a striped shirt, black pants, and a straw hat, warbling some Italian folk song. She couldn't help the giggling. "On second though, strike that idea."
Laurie listened as Josh tried to work out her lie; she tried to hide her smile behind her hands, knowing very well that she had a terrible poker face. When Josh finally volunteered his guess, she pretended disappointment. "Hmm. . .someone didn't pay very good attention to my bookshelves, did he? Strike one: my middle name is Fiona. I think my mom said it was a family name or something, although I don't know of any relatives with the name." She shrugged. "Miss Marple is actually my favorite detective; Mr. Holmes is pretty great- but I think anyone, if they paid enough attention, could be like Miss Marple. It just takes getting understand different types of people."
Josh kicked off the second round with a definite challenge. "Eh. . .so I can definitely see you breaking windows, being in love with bludgers and all; that one's out then. I just know Renaye's mentioned her middle name to me before, but it's a blur. And turning Renaye purple over candy? Who lets four year olds have candy, really. . ."
Her musings having voiced themselves aloud, she pondered the choices internally. She wanted to say the last one was the lie, but in the first round, Josh had made the complicated one the false one. Her eyes considered his features, looking for some kind of telltale sign of which might be the correct answer. It occurred to her then, that despite having traded a mutual confession, they really were acting just like normal. It was good then, she realized, that their friendship, despite its change, had not hurt their dynamic.
Josh's expression changed to realization as Laurie clarified her guess. The suggsetion was made that the three of them do a Little Italy, but Josh couldn't help but feel a little less-than-lenient towards the idea. If they did something like that, he could see himself being forced to be the Pizza chef, wearing some ridiculous outfit for the entertainment of others. Not too appealing. As a result, he was grateful when Laurie let out a laugh (he assumed she had some humiliating image too) and cleared that idea from the board. The topic went back to its origin again as he was proved wrong. ""Hmm. . .someone didn't pay very good attention to my bookshelves, did he?
"Guilty," he replied with mock-shame, hanging his head. For some reason, it was more fun to get the answers wrong. When you didn't guess correctly, it called for an explanation. Laurie replied to his three with a decent analysis. For a second, he thought for sure she would get it, but then...
"Okay then, I'm voting on the middle name one."
"So close," he said, his smile escaping onto his face, "That one is true. My first magic was when I made Renaye's movie disappear so we could watch my favorite instead." Josh turned to her, an idea coming to him. As much as he tried to think up two truths and a lie, all he could come up with were questions he would like answers to. So he voiced his idea.
"You want to play Truth? Someone asks a question and you have to respond truthfully. First to pass loses."
There were plenty of questions he could ask, none of which were very difficult. He simply wanted to know her response. What is your favorite memory? Biggest fear? Greatest hope? After a game of Truth was when they should play two truths and a lie. See how well the other had paid attention...
OOC: There was a bit of confusion to the Truths/Lie game, so I just sort of ran with it.