Chloe Jareau
July 06, 2015 6:54 PM
A letter of possibilities... by Chloe Jareau
Chloe rested her hands on her legs just above her knees while she struggled to catch her breath. She had been running through the maze of the gardens for the past hour. Her body had finally had enough and she was forced to stop. Her legs were shaking from the run, but it felt good, as though she had actually accomplished something. Normally, Chloe would use a stationary bicycle in the MARS sports room as she liked that it tightened up her buttocks and thighs, but today she needed the fresh air and to get the frustrated energy out of her as soon as possible. Running outside had been the best solution at the time and she didn’t regret the choice either.What she did regret though was the fact that she did not bring a water with her. Instead, the pouch that usually contained her bottle of water currently contained the unopened letter that she had received that morning with the post and what had sent her off onto her frustrated run. Finding a bench, Chloe took a seat, making sure only her running shorts touched the surface as she didn’t want her skin sticking to the bench. Her father was not too pleased with her new outfit choices, especially the workout clothes. He said that they showed off too much skin and allowed boys to see the shapeliness of her body. To Chloe, that was the whole point of her new look, but in honesty, that was how workout attire was. The shorts were very short and the tank tops were very tight. Even her other said this was all that was offered nowadays (much to her father’s despair).
She took a moment to retie her bun that had fallen loose as she had her run. Her hair was matted and soaked with sweat. She was sure she looked like a disgusting mess while she tried to fix her hair and not for the first time she questioned whether or not she ought to cut her hair. For a long time, her hair was only long because she wanted to have a connection to her birth mother. It was probably something stupid for her to have believed in, but she had always been so firm with this belief that no one could persuade her otherwise. Now though, she didn’t need any sort of connection or reminder of her birth mother. Even so, she couldn’t bring herself to cut her hair either. Chloe honestly thought that her hair was the prettiest part of her. It was usually the only physical trait on her that was consistently complimented on and she wasn’t ready to part with her hair just yet. It was such a shallow thing for her to admit to, but her hair was such a part of her now that she didn’t know how people would perceive her without it.
Chloe pulled her hands away from her hair, task completed, and sat back on the bench with her face pointed toward the sky. It was a beautiful fall day. The sun was warm, but not so much so that it was hot. The sort of weather that one could comfortably walk without wearing a jacket but also wouldn’t become sticky with sweat. Unless they went running for an hour like she had. The bench was in a slightly more secluded area, so she didn’t think anyone would bother her unless a Pecari took the long way around to the common room.
She sighed heavily and sat up on the bench, pulling the letter from the pouch as she did so. She didn’t recognize the handwriting on it, but the name on the return address was her birth mother’s maiden name, Pembroke. From what her father and birth mother have said, the Pembroke family was not of the same status as the Careys or the Brockerts, but they were up and coming and growing stronger with each generation. Whoever this letter was from, it was from her maternal side of the family and she had no idea what they would want from her.
Chloe turned the envelope over in her hands while she contemplated opening it. She hated not knowing, she hated the uncertainty of it, she hated the second guessing of herself. She had always wanted to know about them but now that this moment was here, she wanted to rip it up and move on with her life. But she couldn’t get herself to do it. A part of her still wanted that connection and it made her sick to her stomach. Why was she still trying to find some sort of family in her mom? After what she had done… what she had put Chloe through, why did Chloe still want something from her? Why couldn’t Chloe just walk away and forget everything about that woman? Why, after all this time, was her mother’s side of the family reaching out to her? What was Chloe supposed to do? She had a family. A great family. Why was she so in need of more?
Chloe threw the envelope down on the bench next to her with an angry grunt and dropped her head into her hands. Maybe the letter was telling her that her mother had finally died. It was a terrible thought but it would allow Chloe to really move on from all of that. Or maybe it was a letter telling her that her mother needed some blood or something from her as she was an only match and then Chloe would feel obligated to see her and help her and thus the cycle of all of this would start over again. Or maybe it was a letter telling her to leave them alone and never try to find them ever again. Even that would give her some relief.
Chloe picked the letter up again and stared a the writing on the envelope as if willing it to tell it what the contents said so she wouldn’t have to open it. A voice nearby startled her and with a squeal of surprise, Chloe dropped the letter as though it burned her and looked around to see who had suddenly intruded upon her bench area. “Sorry, I thought I was alone.” She rushed out, feeling as though she had been caught doing something she shouldn’t have been.
6
Chloe Jareau
A letter of possibilities...
267
Chloe Jareau
1
5
Arnold Manger
July 10, 2015 5:37 PM
A package of sympathy by Arnold Manger
No matter what he did, Arnold could not shake off the sensation of being a middle child. In almost every way, he felt like an average, an amalgamation of his older sister and younger brother. Sally had always been all smarts, whereas Jake had always been all heart. Arnold was something of a median; his intellect was commendable, but he was still heavily created. Sally always seemed older than she was, and Jake always seemed younger than he was. Arnold felt very much his true age.Dealings with their father were no exception to this formula. As always, Sally stood firmly on one end and Jake on the other. His sister was absolute on having no contact whatsoever with the man. His brother wanted to believe the best possible of him and give him as many chances as it took for him to get it right. But Arnold felt more conflicted. He knew what had gone on, what his father had done, and yet he felt a strange allegiance that kept him tethered to a man he knew had done extreme wrong.
Arnold wanted to forgive, but he could not seem to forget, which made him question whether or not he was even actually forgiving. He wished he could just pretend nothing ever happened, but doing so felt like an injustice to his mother, who had gone through so much at the hands of his father during their marriage and even after. But even despite what he had done, Ross Manger was his father, so wasn’t he supposed to love him unconditionally and show forgiveness in the face of difficulty?
He had done well in the past to simply ignore the entire issue, communicating with his father only when prompted and otherwise being content in the happy household his mother had forged with Jeffrey O’Malley, but as of late, it had grown harder and harder to do. This year, his father continued to not only write but send gifts, and while Jake could not see what was happening, Arnold picked up all too well. Merlin, what he would have paid to experience the same naivety as his brother.
Today’s package had served as his breaking point. It was smaller than some of the others and made a jingling noise when shaken. Arnold assumed it was maybe a watch or something, but he couldn’t bring himself to open it. Instead, he just buried it in his pocket, the brown package still calling his name, and decided to go for a walk and clear his head.
The outdoors of the Labyrinth Gardens, he decided, would do him some good. But half to his surprise, he was apparently not the only one to have that idea. On a bench not far from where he strolled, he noticed Chloe laboring over an envelope. He was pretty sure he had seen it come for her that morning and was confused as to why she hadn’t opened it yet until he felt the small box unopened in his pocket. Partially out of sympathy and partially out of sympathy, he approached her. “Hey, uh, you okay, Chloe?” he asked.
The squeak she emitted returned the favor of startling her, and he jerked back instinctively. “No worries,” he said casually when she apologized, regaining his posture and taking a few more steps closer. “Mind if I join you?” Arnold glanced at her envelope where she had dropped it. “Family stuff?” he guessed understandingly, pulling out the package in his pocket. “I know the feeling.”
12
Arnold Manger
A package of sympathy
261
Arnold Manger
0
5
Chloe
July 10, 2015 10:37 PM
A seat for companionship by Chloe
Chloe was surprised to find that it was Arnold who had graced her with his presence. She had thought for sure that it was probably another Pecari out on the paths looking for trouble. Chloe wasn’t sure if she had ever seen Arnold out this way before, but then she remembered that he was probably hoping to catch Ji-Eun or something and only happened upon her instead. Chloe really didn’t want to think about people coupling up at the moment. She didn’t really want to think about anything, if she were being honest. She just wanted to do nothing. Think of nothing. She wanted to just disappear into the background and be forgotten for a few days until she figured out what to do with herself and with the letter.She was going to tell him that Ji-Eun wasn’t around and was probably off studying somewhere but before she could say anything, Arnold asked if he could join her instead and indicated the letter she had dropped in her moment of surprise. “Oh, er, sure.” She replied, bending to pick up the envelop and scooted over a little to make some room for him on the bench. Chloe had been around Arnold plenty of times due to his relationship with both her brother and her roommate, but she wasn’t sure if they had ever hung out just the two of them before. She felt a little weird about it as though it was forbidden for them to hang out without the others around or something. It was a weird feeling to have and she wasn’t even sure why.
At his question regarding her envelop, Chloe hesitated with any sort of answer. But, he had offered his own sympathies regarding it considering he was carrying around a small package. Chloe was just as curious about his package as she was about her own letter. Why wouldn’t Arnold want to open a gift? What is it that he was so worried about? Would someone send him something mean or grotesque that he would find terrible? Chloe would love a gift from someone. Really. Gifts were great! But she only got questionable letters.
Of course, if her biological mother’s family sent her a package, she’d be hesitant to open it too. She didn’t think Arnold had any shady family drama though. None that she was aware anyway, but since they weren’t secret confidants with one another, Arnold could have an entirely different sort of family life than she pegged him to have.
“It’s sort of family stuff.” Chloe answered. Technically speaking, they were her family. But they hadn’t ever been a part of her life and she was adopted legally by another woman, so, that also meant that technically, they were no longer her actual family. It was all so confusing. “It’s a letter from my biological mom’s family.” She explained, seeing no reason to hide her history with Arnold as she had always been so open about being adopted with everyone else. Well, half adopted anyway. Her dad was still her biological dad. “I have never met them before, or even heard from them before.” Chloe advised. “And then today I suddenly get a letter from them. I didn’t even think they knew I existed, or, if they did know, that they would want any sort of contact with me. I just can’t get myself to open it to find out what they want though.” Chloe gave a pathetic laugh. “It’s stupid, right? To be scared of a letter? I shouldn’t care what they want, right? But I do. I do care and that bothers me.”
Chloe made another noise out of frustration. “What’s your package about?” Chloe asked, feeling like since she just shared maybe he would too. “Some cursed object in there from a hateful sibling? Or worse?” She asked, half joking.
6
Chloe
A seat for companionship
0
Chloe
0
5
Arnold
July 11, 2015 4:46 PM
A ____ for _____ (I'm out of ideas) by Arnold
As Chloe began to explain her situation, Arnold found himself experiencing a myriad of confusion, concern, and surprise at both the events and her willingness to share with him, although he guessed he probably should have been less surprised. Chloe had always been a different kind of girl than he was used to. And that wasn’t a bad thing; she was just more… animated, he supposed. More lively and energetic. Her openness was simply another fun little quirk he got to discover along the way. Really, she was quite interesting. If not for the combination of his deep infatuation with Ji-Eun, his roommate/friend allegiance to Emery, and his fear of powerful women like Chloe and Emery’s mother, he might have dared to consider her in less platonic terms. Of course, even with those factors, he could not deny the aesthetic pleasure that was the beautiful young woman Chloe had grown up to be.“That’s really rough,” he commented unhelpfully but sympathetically. Arnold wasn’t particularly close to his relatives on the Manger side of the family, but he’d always been close to the Crosbys, and now he was beginning to feel a sense of belonging among the O’Malleys and even parts of the Brockerts. It was a big, confusing family, and he was very lucky, barring his troubles with his father.
The redhead couldn’t help but chuckle at her inquiry as to his own predicament. “Not today,” he answered casually, both amused and alarmed at how real that possibility was with a step-sister like Carrie O’Malley. “No, it’s from my dad. I’m pretty sure it’s just, like, a watch or something. This package itself really isn’t the problem.” Arnold sighed, preparing to match Chloe’s heaviness with his own. “My parents got divorced when Jake and I were pretty young, and we’ve spent most of that time living with our mom because our dad is… not the best guy.” Spelling things out completely was not a step he was ready to take.
“Lately, he keeps sending us these random and often expensive gifts. I think he’s trying to buy us back or something,” Arnold admitted. “I’m just kinda conflicted because I feel like I’m supposed to just let it be and forgive him because he’s my dad, but he’s done some pretty bad stuff to my mom that I’m not sure I can ignore.” After a moment paused silence, his blue eyes darted away, a light blush rising in his cheeks. “Sorry, that was, uh, probably more than you really wanted to know.”
As the redness dissipated, he glanced at her envelope, then at his own package, and finally back to her. “How about we open them together? And if this really is something nice and your letter really is bad, we can just trade.” He didn’t really want these gifts, and maybe a nice new watch might cheer Chloe up.
12
Arnold
A ____ for _____ (I'm out of ideas)
261
Arnold
0
5
Chloe
July 11, 2015 8:17 PM
Yeah, it's a hard one to follow. by Chloe
Chloe gave a small laugh at Arnold’s response. Maybe she was wrong and he had no idea about her and Emery’s family dynamics? She had just assumed that Emery would have told Arnold about how their family worked. Neither of them was ashamed of where they came from or how their family came about. Chloe loved her family and everything that was uniquely them. Some people couldn’t han dle things that they did, but it made them a stronger family unit. “I’m sorry, did you not already know all that? I thought Emery might have said something.” Chloe shrugged. “Kiva is my adopted mom, my dad is my biological dad. My biological mom didn’t want to be a mom, so she left. When Kiva and my dad married, Kiva adopted me and my dad adopted Emery.” Chloe had to wonder if Arnold knew Emery was from a sperm donor. She didn’t think Emery necessarily went around telling that to people, but she was certain he wasn’t bothered by the information either.“And then they adopted our brother and sister, Angel and Ayita. Harper, our little sister, is the only biological child between both of them. It’s probably a little confusing, but Emery and Kiva have been in my life since I was a baby. It’s just so natural to call her mom and him my brother.” Chloe’s blue eyes wandered back down to the letter in her hands and once again, hated herself for being curious enough with what they had to say that she couldn’t bring herself to throw it away. Her life was good and grand. She was happy where it mattered. She had never really been so curious about them before. Why did that have to change? Why?
She raised a well-shaped eyebrow at him when he commented about his own father. She wondered if that meant he was a drunk or something. Chloe never would have thought that about Arnold. She remembered his brother from classes last year and he always seemed to happy and easy-going. Kids weren’t like that if they came from terrible backgrounds, were they?
At the mention of his mother, however, Chloe knew it was worse than that. He didn’t say it outright, but ‘treated my mom’ and ‘not a nice guy’ was leaning towards an abusive relationship. Perhaps alcohol was involved in that too, but she didn’t think that made much of a difference. Chloe never would have thought that Arnold came from a background like that. “No, its okay, I don’t mind.” Chloe said, waving off his apology. Ava had confided in her and now Arnold was. She wondered what was up with parents. “I’m sorry your dad is so terrible.” She said. “But I get why it’s hard to let him go. He is your dad. Good or bad. But, I don’t think that means you have to forgive him for… whatever he’s done.”
Chloe thought about his proposal. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to open it with him sitting next to her. What if she cried? What if what was written was so terrible and so embarrassing that Arnold laughs at her or tells other people about it?
Then again, Arnold didn’t really seem like the type of person who went around spreading other people’s business and Ji-Eun wouldn’t be friends with him if he was. “Okay, deal.” Chloe said, holding her hand out to shake. “On the count of three…. One. Two….” Chloe hesitated again but without any further excuses, “Three!” She cried out and in one quick swoop, tore the envelop open.
Dear Ms. Jareau,
My name is Edna Pembroke and I am your grandmother. This letter must come as a shock to you after all of these years and I hope that in some way I can explain the reason for that. When I first found out about you last Christmas, I wasn’t sure what to believe. Our daughter, that is, your mother, she has always claimed various ideas and beliefs that turned out to be false and eventually we stopped believing the things she told us. Her disease only complicated the matters.
Our attorneys recently confirmed with us that you are her daughter. The news of this was quite a shock and my husband and I were uncertain of what to do. I know this letter must be rather confusing for you and I do apologize for that. Our daughter ran away from home around the time she became pregnant with you. We hadn’t seen or heard from her for several years after that and when she did return, she was not in the best health. We never knew that Lottie had a child.
We know that our daughter has no legal right to you any longer and that your father has raised you into a beautiful young woman based on what Lottie has told us. I wanted to thank you for taking care of her when she relapsed. I cannot even imagine how terrifying that must have been for you and I hope you never have to go through that again. You were brave and you saved her life. Your parents must be undeniably proud to have you as their daughter.
I know that I have no right to ask anything of you having never been in your life, but I was hoping to one day, when you are ready and willing, to meet you. Our daughter never gave us a chance to know you and I regret that we did not search for her harder during that time, but I would love to know my granddaughter with your parents’ permission and blessing, of course.
I look forward to hearing from you so that we can explain in person.
Yours Truly,
Edna Pembroke
Chloe finished reading the letter and stared at it. “She wasn’t disowned.” She finally said. Chloe’s biological grandparents had never known about her because her mother ran away before she was pregnant. Either her dad had been told wrong or he had lied to her all this time. Chloe felt numb and empty again. She needed time to really understand what was going on.
“How did your package go?”
6
Chloe
Yeah, it's a hard one to follow.
0
Chloe
0
5
Arnold
July 17, 2015 6:25 PM
I like this free, pattern-less style much better. by Arnold
As Chloe fully outlined the Kijewski-Jareau dynamic, some of which he knew from Emery and some of which sounded unfamiliar, Arnold couldn’t help but notice some of the parallels between their households. While no one was entirely adopted in the Manger-O’Malley joint family, there were kids from separate families united by a parental marriage and one much-younger child with a little piece of everyone. The only real differences were the adoptions in their family and the multiple children from each parent. Chloe and Emery were each, biologically speaking, only children until Harper came along, but Ryan (poor soul) had always had Carrie, and likewise, he had always had Sally and Jake. Chloe mentioned that Emery and his mother had been in her life for basically all of it, so they had likely grown up as pseudo-siblings, but even still, they were the same age. Neither of them would have known what it was like to have someone bigger looking out for you, or what it was like to quietly cover over somebody smaller. Arnold was lucky enough to grow up knowing both.“I think I’ve heard most of that,” he answered lightly. “My family’s pretty similar, actually. There’s me, Sally, and Jake from my mom, and Ryan and Carrie O’Malley from their dad, and then our sister Peyton from this marriage.” Arnold smiled. “It’s pretty fun having a little sister, isn’t it?” It had been pretty clear for a long time that Ryan was Peyton’s favorite, but Arnold didn’t mind being the second or third favorite brother. She was too cute to be mad at for long, anyway.
Chloe’s input on his situation kind of felt like the same things he was trying to tell himself, although hearing her say it outloud made it seem so different, so… real. “Yeah,” was the only response he could manage. “It’s just.. yeah. It’s weird.”
He was half glad and half disappointed that Chloe accepted his proposal. It was good to have support from one another in case the results were bad, but now he also actually had to open the package. Of course, his physical item was going to be fine--a shiny new thing, way better than a possibly damaging letter from unknown relatives. But he didn’t want to look at it and think about what it represented: the lingering control his father was so desperate to maintain.
“One. Two.... Three!”
Arnold began to peel open the paper surrounding the item, but he found himself more interested in watching Chloe’s eyes scan back and forth across the page, trying to gauge the nature of the letter from her facial reactions. He supposed he could just read over her shoulder--he was a very quick reader and might have been able to get through it even faster than she did--but that wasn’t right. Anything she would want him to know, she would tell him. But when she finished, all she said was a seemingly incredulous, “She wasn’t disowned.” before inquiring to his package.
“Oh,” he fumbled, finishing off the wrappings to reveal, as he had anticipated, a gold watch. Attached was a small tag, which he read aloud: “ ‘Saw this and thought of you. Love, Dad.’ ” Arnold paused, then ripped off the tag and held the watch out toward Chloe. “You can have this if you want it. It looks pretty gender non-specific, and I don’t want to keep it.” He forced a small smile. “And if you do, you better claim it soon or else I might offer it to your brother.”
12
Arnold
I like this free, pattern-less style much better.
261
Arnold
0
5
Chloe
July 28, 2015 8:15 PM
It does give room for creativity. by Chloe
Chloe smiled, “Yeah, it’s pretty amazing watching grow from this little crying blob into this hyper active little girl with so much personality.” Chloe commented. She really did love her little sister. She could get super annoying sometimes when she threw a tantrum here and there when she didn’t get things her way, but that was forgivable since she was so small and adorable. If she was still behaving like that when she was sixteen, Chloe will have to rethink this whole ‘little sister’ thing. “You have a pretty blended family there.” Chloe commented. It was rare to find another person who had family dynamics so similar to her own. Granted, Ayita and Angel were literally adopted children and weren’t from one parent or another, but it was basically the same thing.She nodded. It was weird. “It’s incredibly difficult to forgive someone that you’re supposed to love but who has hurt you in a terrible way.” She commented. Honestly, Chloe wasn’t even sure if some things were really ever forgivable. She thought abuse would be close to the top of that list. It took a weak person to abuse someone that was more vulnerable than them, but it wasn’t something she knew too much about and so, couldn’t really add anything to make his situation better.
Chloe’s already fairly large blue eyes grew even larger when Arnold offered her the gold watch. She knew that he didn’t want it but it looked extremely expensive and Chloe wasn’t sure how she would feel walking around with that sort of item on her wrist. What if Ji-Eun asked her about it and she said that Arnold gave it to her? Wouldn’t that feel like a bit of a betrayal to her best friend? Chloe didn’t want that. “How about, I’ll hold on to it for you and keep it in a safe place?” Chloe offered. She could hide it in the bottom of her trunk and completely forget about it until he either asks for it back or she unpacks it at home during the summer and finds it. When that happens, she wouldn’t feel bad about wearing it.
She didn’t feel comfortable enough with him to actually let him read the letter since that would be revealing a lot more of herself to him than she really wanted. Ji-Eun and Emery might trust him, but he was still only an acquaintance to her and with all of these weird writings being thrown about the school lately, Chloe wasn’t just going to let everyone know what her business was. It meant no offense to Arnold, he really did seem like a nice guy, but until Chloe knew where things stood in her life, only a select few would know what was going on in it. And even then, it would be really limited.
“So, apparently my mother left home before she was ever pregnant with me.” Chloe informed Arnold. “My grandparents weren’t made aware of me until recently and now they would like to meet me.” Chloe gave a tense smile. Lately, everyone had been wanting to meet her. The first time ended poorly. She could only imagine how this would end. “But, after my last encounter with a Pembroke, I’m not so sure I want to really jump on that idea just yet.” Chloe commented lightly. “Good news though is that I’m still technically part of the Pureblood crowd if my bio mom was never disowned and so my bio grandparents might still claim me as their lineage.” Chloe said almost jokingly. Maybe this would be her in with Malcolm…
“Any idea on how you’ll get your dad to leave you alone for awhile?” Chloe asked, returning back to the point of this little meeting.
6
Chloe
It does give room for creativity.
0
Chloe
0
5